


Supernova

by Breac_Rosetta



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-09
Updated: 2015-09-24
Packaged: 2018-04-08 10:01:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 24,578
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4300524
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Breac_Rosetta/pseuds/Breac_Rosetta
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Even the biggest stars can only burn so brightly for so long</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Explosive Force

Nobody had ever expected much from her. She was a Jasper. She was big, she was strong, and she didn't ask questions. Not at first. She was made to be a soldier, and she was good at it. Created on Earth and forged during the fire of the civil war, Jasper was given her calling in life from the moment she pulled herself out of a cliff face. Summon helmet, crush traitors, follow orders. She knew what she had to do, and there was nothing to be done but to do it.

In some ways, she was lucky. Her size and strength put her above other gems like her. She was noticed by her commanders from the beginning. Unfortunately for her, that meant being chosen to fight on the front lines. She didn't think about the implications of it at first. It had seemed like an honor. Recognition for her inherent superiority. It was something she was told from the day she understood spoken words, from her birth into the tumultuous, war-torn battlefield called Earth.

'Only the strong survive.'

It was repeated to her, and she repeated it to herself. A Lie. Or rather, an incomplete truth. It's something that slowly dawns on her with each passing battle, each time she survives and others do not. The commanders begin to pay attention to her, the way she watches her enemies, skirts around cannon fire, deflects punches with her helmet, then waits for the right moment to attack. She needs more than brute strength to survive; she needs wits. And the more she thinks, the more she realizes that intellect not something a Jasper is supposed to have.

She is a Jasper. She is a solider. She is disposable. Her duty is to charge into the fray head-on, regardless of the risk. The other Jaspers obey, and the other Jaspers die. There's always more Jaspers though, an ever-changing stream of Jaspers coming and vanishing from one battle to the next. She's the only constant. She raises the interest of her commanders, but ultimately they don't care too much one way or another. Her willingness to fight is all that matters, and on that account, Jasper is more than happy to oblige. That is, until the time comes that she does not obey.

She's under the command of an Agate, a small gem, dim witted and sharp tongued with a mind on greater ranks. Jasper hates her. Desperate for power, but too afraid to actually fight herself, Agate commands her troops from a distance, then swoops in to seize any glory left behind. A wretch. With every blow Jasper takes, every enemy she fights, she thinks it to herself over and over. Why does Agate get the praise when Jasper and the others are the ones doing the fighting? Who gave Agate the right to sit behind and let other gems fight and die for her? Jasper's fought longer, fought harder, knows this war more intimately than Agate could possibly understand, so why does she always get treated dirt and Agate gets praise? Coward. Sniveler. Wretch.

Agate gathers her squadron around one day, ready to announce a new plan. Jasper stands near the front, arms crossed as she simmers in her distaste. Agate struts around in front of the gems under her command as she lays out details of a new plan. A rebel base nearby happens to have a stockpile of wailing stones. Agate wants them all to storm the base and take the stones. Jasper stares at her commander in slaw-jawed disbelief. When Agate asks if there's any questions, Jasper raises a hand, and all eyes turn to her. Agate raises a brow and gives her a suspicious nod.

"Why, exactly, are you making us risk all our lives for nothing? Wailing stones are as common as dirt; they're not important." A dead silence hangs over the group as the gems near Jasper back away, their wide eyes darting back between her and Agate. Agate marches over and eyes Jasper up and down, the smaller gem barely coming up to Jasper's chest.

"So sorry, let me explain it to you on your level." Agate sneers. "The rebels are bad. We want to stop the rebels. If we take their wailing stones, they can't talk to each other. If they can't talk to each other, they lose and we win, which is good."

"BUT THAT'S POINTLESS!" Jasper roars, her whole body trembling in anger.

"OH, JUST SHUT UP AND LISTEN TO ME, YOU STUPID BRUTE!" Agate snaps. Jasper punches her in the face so hard she can feel Agate's physical form pop under the force of her blow. Agate's gem drops neatly to Jasper's feet. The squadron flees. Jasper's summoned by a Topaz the next day. The commander's eyes go over her once, a mean glint reflected in the light.

"It's Jasper, isn't it?"

"Yes, Ma'am." Jasper responds.

"Would you care to explain why you attacked your superior officer with such force that it destroyed her physical form, rendering her unfit for battle for the remainder of the day?"

"She was trying to kill my squadron." Topaz raises an incredulous brow.

"Would you care to explain that?"

"She was trying to send us all to capture a stockpile of wailing stones, knowing full well that the area was well-guarded and the stones were of no strategic importance whatsoever."

"Oh? and you would know about strategy?" Jasper bristles under the comment, the constant reminder of what her place ought to be, what she ought to be. Obedient. Stupid. A big, dumb hulk to be ordered around by someone else. To hell with it. If she's going to be executed for insubordination, she won't do it sniveling and playing the fool.

"I've been fighting in this war just as long as she has. I'm the one who's been on the front lines while she barks orders from the rear. I know a damn sight more than her about what's important and what's not." Jasper says. Topaz says nothing, just smiles thinly, thanks her for her time, and dismisses her.

She's been given a new assignment the next day. She's placed in control of Agate's squadron and tasked to take out an underwater refuge. They're all foot soldiers, as in experienced on land. Not one of them has fought around the ocean, much less beneath it. Jasper stands on the shore, feeling the questioning eyes of her comrades burning holes in her back. Agate still needs time to recover, her squadron is told by Topaz. They have all been placed under Jasper's command in the meantime, since she's obviously got some good ideas. It's all up her, and they expect a major success.

A suicide mission.

Jasper, Topaz, and the squadron all know it's a punishment, a warning for what will happen to Gems who don't know their place. Jasper's fists clench as the waves surround her feet, and she wishes she could smash Topaz into pieces. Instead, she resolves to do better. She resolves to live.

 

*****

The sanctuary is destroyed. Jasper pulls herself out of the ocean, her fingers cleaving small valleys in the sand as she heaves herself up, water pouring in streams from her hair. She is alive, triumphant. Some of her squadron dies, but enough of them manage to make it back to shore to raise the eyebrows and ire of the higher ups. They give her a new squadron, and another suicide mission. She lives. Most of the squadron lives, and Jasper begins to be taken seriously.

The war drags on for longer than anyone thought it would. Despite being outmatched and outnumbered, the resistance hangs on. It's Rose Quartz's powers that tip the balance. Across the planet-turned-battlefield she set up hidden springs, capable of healing injured fighters. Rose's side has few casualties. Jasper sees new, inexperienced faces in her squadron every day. Desertion becomes common. They are losing, and everyone knows it. Still, Jasper fights on. She survives each battle, clawing out a place for herself among the higher-ranking gems. She is feared, respected.

The war draws to a close. Too many lives lost, for too little gain. That's what the official verdict is. It leaves a bitter taste in her mouth for centuries to come, but she's achieved so much in that time. Her days of being nothing more than a mere pawn are long over. For the first time in her life, she's seen as more than just an unthinking weapon. Her commanders truly expect great things from her, and she doesn't intend to disappoint. The universe is waiting for her.

 

*****

The universe isn't what it used to be. Inspecting her reflection in the shiny hull of the ship in front of her, Jasper sometimes finds it just a little strange to be staring at a face practically unchanged in six thousand years. Technology has changed. War has changed. Homeworld, Gems, politics, everything has become so different. Shouldn't all that progress reflect on her somehow? She's had to change, after all. Her prowess during the civil war could only carry her so far. As time passed, Jasper had to learn to adapt. There was no other choice. Looking into the hull of the dingy ship, Jasper reflects on how she wound up on such a strange detour in her lifelong journey.

She had overheard bits and pieces about it from various gems in the station. Some technician gem was looking for an escort on a dangerous mission. She hadn't been provided one by her commanding officer, so she had apparently taken it upon herself to find someone. From what Jasper heard, she was still looking around. A strange affair, but Jasper didn't pay much attention until she overheard the real story.

Two mid-ranking gems were talking about it in hushed giggles. A technician whose mouth is smarter than her mind, who's complained a little too often a little too loudly. In conspiratorial chuckles and whispers, they mention her mission. A planet on the border of Gem territory used for thousands of years as a Kindergarten and general outpost, now too degraded for habitation. Evacuation hasn't been as smooth as it should be; there's been inter-gem conflicts for years that have finally reached a boiling point. They want this Peridot to find and fix warp pads broken in the heart of the conflict.

The sharp giggles stab into Jasper. They're sending her out to die. This Peridot, does she even know? Does she honestly think she's been entrusted with an important mission or is she aware of the trouble she's in? Could she even save herself if she knew? It's none of Jasper's business really. Besides, she's got more important things to do, she can't bother with some foolish gem who's gotten herself into trouble. There's nothing Jasper can do.

That doesn't stop her from stewing over it. A dim-witted gem sent off to die for irritating her commanders. Jasper's never been one for sentimentality. The fact that society has abandoned rituals and spirituality in favor of sheer utilitarianism has been one change she always appreciated. Still, the fate of this unknown gem irritates her. They couldn't just reprimand her or execute her; no, they have to pretend like they actually believe she'll succeed. Compared to what Jasper did, this Peridot's practically blameless. A suicide mission for being mouthy? Everything about it is so completely asinine that it makes Jasper boil.

To the stars with it. She can afford to waste a month or two. She can always pull some excuse out of her gem about being concerned for a potential civil war. Jasper turns and approaches the pair, still snickering to themselves. They immediately stop and straighten up as soon as Jasper's shadow falls over them.

"What's this I hear about an unstable planet?" Jasper barks. The two turn to exchange glances, cowering in place. A few calls to the right Gems, a few strings pulled, and Jasper finds herself assigned as an escort. She now stands impatiently next to the ship, examining herself and tapping her foot in irritation. The sooner this mission is over and this Peridot can fend for herself again, the better.

Jasper hears the gentle hum of the bay doors opening and the soft metallic click of feet walking along the docking station. Peridot's arrived. Jasper doesn't make a move. She stays in place, waits to see how Peridot reacts. She hears the click of Peridot's feet stop. Peridot's noticed her. Click click...click. Her pace has slowed, she's uncertain. Clickclickclickclick. But not afraid. Looking into the reflective hull of the ship, Jasper watches as Peridot approaches her.

"Who are you and what are you doing here? This area is for authorized gems only."

A little spitfire. Jasper isn't sure whether to be pleased or irritated. Jasper turns around, crosses her arms, and inspects the gem who's gotten her wrapped up in such a mess. Peridot takes one step back, looks Jasper over, then straightens up and crosses her arms in turn. She's bold, Jasper will give her that much. No wonder she's in so much trouble.

"I'm your escort." Jasper barks, and watches Peridot's reaction closely. Jasper isn't what she wanted. Peridot makes no effort to hide her disappointment upon meeting her for the first time. Peridot's eyes go over Jasper a few times, taking her in.

"I had assumed you would be..." Peridot doesn't say it. She doesn't need to. Jasper's heard it all before. "I had assumed a gem with a similar archetype as mine would be accompany me." A polite way to put it. Part of Jasper begins to regret wasting her time on this gem. Does this brash fool even know what kind of danger she's put herself in? Doesn't matter. Jasper's already made the commitment, and she's always been one to see things through to the end. It will only be a few months anyway. Either Jasper can put some sense into this young gem's head or she's beyond help.

"And what exactly would be the point of another gem like you coming along for the ride?" Jasper snapped. "You wanted back up, didn't you? Did you really think having another technician was your solution? The whole point of having back up is to have someone who can protect you, isn't it?"

"Well I..." Peridot started, taken aback. "Well, fine. Let's just board this glorified garbage heap and get going." Peridot quickly walked past Jasper and onto the ship. Jasper grunted and followed behind. Peridot had one thing right. The ship they have is cramped and outdated; a low-end model even when it was new, which by Jasper's guess was around seven or eight hundred years ago. It's the kind of ship no one would mind being lost or destroyed. Jasper walked through the halls, examining the inside of the ship as Peridot trailed ahead of her. Every minute or so Peridot let out some noise of disgust, a gag or disgusted gasp or a loud groan, her high-pitched voice echoed down the narrow corridors. It's going to be a very, very, long trip.

"Do you know what kind of ship this is, Peridot?" Jasper asks, stopping so Peridot has to turn around to face her. Oh great. Peridot thinks to herself. Of course she would get saddled with some oversized, ancient brawler who was stuck thousands of years in the past, along with a hulk of barely space-worthy junk. Just her luck.

"It's a Class D-57 Destroyer Escort ship." Peridot snapped. Figures she'd get a gem who didn't even know the basic kinds of ships. Jasper nods once and asks more basic questions about the ship. Peridot answers and Jasper begins to ask her about the weapons, defense system, computational capabilities. So the brute has some basic understanding of warships, Peridot thinks. Still, it's nothing out of the ordinary. Jasper's questions continue and Peridot answers each one in rapid fire, answers about the hull integrity, AI integration, system flaws. Jasper's barrage continues, and Peridot's answers come more slowly, less surely. Questions are fired about maneuverability while in hyperdrive, probability of communication errors while relaying messages through deep-space channels, theoretical capabilities of the ship's weapons systems while simultaneously running the shielding system and Peridot realizes that Jasper has been testing her all along. She keeps up as best she can, but eventually Jasper asks her something Peridot can't answer. Peridot is forced to stop, fumbling over her words as she tries come up with something satisfactory and failing.

"I... I don't know." Peridot says quickly, crossing her arms and looking away. Jasper nods once, apparently satisfied with Peridot's overall knowledge of the ship. Her line of inquiry then changes to a different topic.

"How much do you know about combat, Peridot?"

Peridot snorted. "I'm a technician, not a warrior. What am I supposed to know about combat?"

"Can you summon a weapon?"

"I'm quite certain I don't have one."

"Can you transform?" Jasper's tone has once again become curt.

"No, why would I need to?" Peridot answered, making no effort to hide her rising annoyance.

"Do you at least know how to use a destabilizer?" Jasper snapped.

"No! What part of 'I'm a technician' aren't you hearing? That's never been part of my job."

"Then you're learning," Jasper barked. "Before this mission is over, I expect you to be able to at least defend yourself."

"That is utterly ridiculous! I'm not putting myself in danger! And furthermore, I'm not marching around telling you how to do my job!"

"That's the stupidest thing I've heard come out of your fool mouth yet."

Peridot jerks back in shock. "How... How DARE you!" She shrieks. "You can't-"

"Can't what?" Jasper shoots back. "Do you remember who I am? Do you remember who you are?" Peridot steps back, her face flushed in anger and embarrassment, fingers clenched and body shaking. Jasper takes a step towards her, invading her space. She needs to know how far she can push this Peridot, needs to know the full extent of what she's up against.

"I am Jasper. I've lead troops into battle during the war for Earth. I helped build the first Dreadnought fleet and piloted them for centuries. I've held a seat on the Symposiums since they started. If I wanted, I could speak directly to Yellow Diamond herself." Peridot keeps trying to back up, but Jasper won't let her, keeps moving forward, bridging the distance between them.

"So tell me, Peridot, what have you done that I should respect? What have you done to earn anyone's respect?" Jasper jabs at Peridot and she falls back, tears beginning to form in her eyes as her body trembles in rage. Peridot doesn't answer her, just stands her ground and glares daggers at Jasper, her fists clenching and unclenching in incompetent fury. Jasper watches her calmly before asking,

"Do you want to hurt me, Peridot?" A flash in Peridot's eyes tell Jasper the real answer.

"No." Liar.

"I'm going to give you a destabilizer, Peridot." Jasper states. "And I want you to try to hit me as hard as you can with it."

"No! Whatever this is, I'm not falling for it! I'm not going to get in trouble for this!"

Jasper walks over to the wall of the ship, places her hand over a seamless panel, and draws a destabilizer from inside. Walking back to Peridot, she tries to hand the device over to the reluctant gem. When Peridot refuses, Jasper sets it on the ground in front of her, then walks until she's a good twenty feet away.

"Here's how it's going to work, Peridot. I'm going to start attacking you. Either you let me hurt you, you learn to fight with your own body, or you use that destabilizer to protect yourself."

Even from across the room, Jasper can see the way Peridot's body tenses, twitches, starts pulling in different directions as the gravity of the situation dawns on her. Jasper lets her get her bearings for a moment, then dashes forward. Peridot scrambles to pick up the destabilizer, drops it once, and manages to grab it and activate it as Jasper dashes in and makes a swipe for Peridot. Jasper keeps her movements slow, clunky, easy to read. All of it is lost on Peridot, who jumps back, stumbles, and swings the golden tool in front of her wildly. As far as Peridot's concerned, every second of it is real. She doesn't realize that if Jasper had really wanted to harm her, she'd be smashed before she could blink. Jasper approaches again, makes another motion as if to punch her and Peridot swings widely and thrusts the destabilizer towards her arm. Jasper pulls back and swings from the other side, shoving Peridot and sending her sprawling.

"Stop it!" Peridot shrieks.

"HIT ME!" Jasper yells. There's a flash in Peridot's eyes and she darts forward, jabbing the prongs at Jasper's face. Jasper jumps back and Peridot jabs forward again, missing Jasper's chest. Jasper makes another swing at her and Peridot jabs at Jasper's incoming fist, prongs barely missing her body. A quick twist of her wrist and Jasper has Peridot's hand firmly clenched in hers, the destabilizer rendered useless. Peridot jerks, turns her head just in time to see Jasper's fist coming in from the other side. She tenses up and Jasper stops her blow right against Peridot's cheek, her knuckles ghosting on Peridot's face.

"You lose." Jasper murmurs. Peridot opens her clenched eyes, looking up at Jasper in a mix of confusion and fear. Jasper lets go of Peridot and pulls back her hand. Peridot quickly ducks under Jasper's arms and dashes off to the side, out of her grasp.

"For your first time, that wasn't completely horrendous. We're going to do this once a day until you're good enough to stand your own against me." Jasper turns and walks off, leaving a bug-eyed Peridot to herself. "Go familiarize yourself with the ship for the rest of the day. Be back here at the same time tomorrow."

*****

  
The next few days pass in a similar fashion. Peridot keeps to herself as much as possible; when Jasper accidentally crosses her path, she either turns the other way or walks quickly past Jasper, muttering curses under her breath. Peridot has gotten no better at using a destabilizer, either. Each match is the same; Peridot fumbles, makes a few wild swings, gets shoved around until Jasper disarms her.

A week has passed, and Jasper is standing alone in the room where they spar, anger bubbling. Peridot's stood her up. Like hell she's going to get out of this. Jasper storms out the room and begins stalking down the halls, looking for Peridot. She shouldn't have bothered with this stupid mission or this stupid gem. Peridot is nothing like her. She's got no ambition, no planning, and she's not that bright either. Jasper should have just left her to her fate.

Jasper finds her tucked away near the heart of the ship, scrolling through some pointless stream of data at her fingertips. She turns around at the rumble of Jasper's feet, her holo-screen quickly dissolving and her fingers snapping back into place at her side. Peridot backs up, nervous but defiant as Jasper approaches her.

"Why weren't you at upper deck?" Jasper snapped.

"I had more pressing matters than being shoved around by you."

"You think this is a joke?" Jasper yelled. She'd finally reached her boiling point with Peridot. She was done being soft. Peridot was an irresponsible, overly brash, smart-mouthed, dirt-brained jackass who needed someone to smack some sense into her.

"The whole thing is pointless! I don't need to learn any of this! I'm not going to put myself in danger!"

"You already have, you utter imbecile!" Jasper exploded. "What do think this entire mission even was?"

"I've been sent to repair-"

"All by yourself? Without training?" Jasper countered. "Without help?"

Peridot pauses as the pieces begin to sink into place.

"But you-"

"Nobody assigned me to you, Peridot. If I didn't overhear you sorry plight, you'd be halfway to your death by now."

Peridot is silent for a while as she takes it all in. That can't be right. They wouldn't. It's not like... She's not...She never really...Peridot looks to Jasper again, studying her face for any sign that this is some sort of sick training, some way of assessing her performance. A trick. A joke. Something. Anything. Anything at all. Peridot stands still, silently pleading with Jasper for this to be some sort of test, for her to drop this act and tell her not to be so gullible for believing in this. It shouldn't come as a surprise to her, honestly. Peridot knows she's never been anyone's favorite, has let a few too many gems overhear what she really thinks about them. Still, the whole thing doesn't feel right. She feels divorced from the reality of the situation. The knowledge that she's been sent to her death is severed from the emotions that should accompany such knowledge. At the moment, all she feels is vague sense of unease and irritation.

"It was Beryl, wasn't it? She was the one who did this." Peridot finally asks. Jasper offers a halfhearted shrug lets the gravity of the situation fall on Peridot. Her temper's fizzled away. She hadn't really intended to tell Peridot the truth, but it wasn't doing either of them any good to keep it under wraps any more. Peridot deserved the truth, one way or another. Maybe now she'll finally understand what's at stake.  
"I shouldn't have called her a clod." Peridot muttered, looking away. "Not where she could hear me, at least." Another pause and a glace at Jasper. "I'm not stupid, you know. I know I shouldn't have done it at all. I know I've been in trouble. I just didn't think..."Peridot paused again before exploding, "Well, why didn't someone just say something to me? I would have stopped! They didn't need to do this."

A silence settled over the ship, falling lightly on Jasper and Peridot's shoulders.

"I don't deserve this." Peridot whispered.

"No, you don't. But it's what you got anyways."

"So why are you here?" Peridot snapped, looking back up at Jasper. "To rub it in my face?"

"You haven't listened to a damn word I said. I'm here to pull your sorry gem out of trouble."

"Why?"

"It's like you said; you didn't deserve this."

Peridot wasn't sure what to think. She slowly brought her arms up to her sides, trying to make sense of everything. She tries to piece together all the separate elements, of Jasper, this mission, of her standing back home into something coherent but all that results is a jumbled mess in her mind. It's always been like this. She hates being told what to do, but she can never think of anything better to do on her own. She's always been like this too, bitter and sarcastic, lashing out at those around her for her own subpar ability to think of any better ideas. She supposed it was only a matter of time before she took it too far, but still, but still!

Peridot turned to Jasper again, eyeing her up. She didn't know why Jasper taken pity on her. At the moment, Peridot only had one real concern.

"So what happens to me now?"

"I can take you as far as this mission, then you're on your own again. Whatever happens up to that point is your choice."

Peridot nods once as Jasper left, leaving Peridot to her thoughts. When Jasper walked into their training area the next day she found Peridot already there, destabilizer in hand. Jasper grinned slightly as she stepped forward. Peridot looked up from the destabilizer she was twirling in her hands and simply said,

"Like I'm going to let a clod like Beryl get the best of me."

Jasper smiled widely and crackled her knuckles.

*****

  
Jasper cursed and ducked her head, the destabilizer barely missing her temple. She has to hand it to Peridot. Once she gets serious, she can hold her own. It's been a little over a month and Peridot is making progress. Another jab to the back of her head and Jasper jerked back, her body slamming into the wall behind her. Peridot rushed her and Jasper threw herself on the ground and rolled away. Peridot's augmented body is full of surprises. In the cramped confines of the ship, her ability to run around on the walls and ceilings has forced Jasper to take their practice seriously. Peridot propelled herself off the ceiling and onto the floor, dashing towards Jasper. Jasper got up, waiting for Peridot to get close enough, then leapt over her and swept Peridot's legs out from under her with a massive foot. As Peridot fell she twisted herself, trying to stab at Jasper's foot, which Jasper quickly snapped back to her body as she sprung forward, grabbing Peridot's fist and slamming downward, the destabilizer skidding out of the way.

"You lose again." Jasper states with a grin as Peridot lies on the ground, panting for breath. "But you're getting better. If someone wasn't paying attention, you might actually be a threat." Peridot lets out a cackle as Jasper releases her grip.

"Oh, please. You're losing your advantage and you know it. It's just a matter of time before I best you."

"Maybe. But that's not going to be today."

Peridot smiled as she brushed herself off. She had to admit, there was something satisfying about these sessions. She had spent her entire life being shoved around, told what to do. To be in a position where she could shove back, make a gem as big and powerful as Jasper retreat from her blows, was deeply gratifying. It didn't matter that she had never actually won a match yet. She was getting closer, and in the meantime it felt good to practice like this.

They went their separate ways after training. Peridot was never quite certain what Jasper did with her free time. Peridot always went to the same place; the crystal heart of the ship, either to study up on the planet or take a peek at the archaic code of the ship's computer for a good laugh. Sometimes she would walk the halls just to break up the monotony, or check on the small inventory of supplies for their mission. Every once in a while she would meet Jasper in the halls. They would talk about various things, but inevitably their conversations would die down and one of them would walk off before the silence became too much. Still, Peridot found herself walking the halls more often than not as the days passed.

They'll be at the planet soon. Glad might be too strong of a word for it, but all things considered, Jasper is satisfied with her decision to go on this mission. She might not be the most eager gem, but between the sarcasm and verbal jabs, Peridot's fairly quick to catch on. Of course, the real challenge won't be up here, in the safety of the ship. Once they get to the surface, all bets are off. Jasper will do what she can, but after that... after that, Jasper can only hope.

*****

  
The planet hovers into view, grayish blue and surrounded by now-defunct satellites. They'll land tomorrow and begin work on their repairs. Peridot stares out the viewport, wrapped in her thoughts. They were allotted a single RedEye drone to sweep the planet and report its findings. It won't be too much, considering RedEyes are about as high-tech as their current ship. Still, it should at least tell them roughly how many gems are left and where their populations are clustered.

It's practically nothing at all. The weight of the situation finally comes crashing down on Peridot. She knows practically nothing of this planet, of these gems, of how to fix warp pads or avoid a skirmish. She's going to die out there. There's no way around it. She's going to die and there's nothing she can do about it. Her body suddenly feels insubstantial, composed of mere threads of light, quaking and shivering and ready to scatter about at a moment's notice. A large hand comes to rest on her shoulder, bringing her back together. Body still trembling, Peridot turns back and upwards to look at Jasper.

"It's going to be fine." Jasper tells her. Peridot nods once, trying to convince herself. Yes, yes, it will be fine. Jasper is her to protect her. She's been training too. They can get through this mission and come back triumphant. Peridot can't wait to tell a few choice gems where to stick it. As if seeing the flash in her eyes, Jasper continues.

"I'm going to give you one last piece of advice, Peridot. Whatever happens, don't try to fight anyone. If something seems fishy, don't stick around, just run."

"WHAT?" Peridot exploded. "Then why have why have I spent the past month learning how to use a destabilizer?"

"That's only if you can't run." Jasper explained. "Don't be stupid about it. If something happens, you run. Don't try to fight, don't stay behind, just save your own gem and try to get back up. Don't fight if you don't have to. Understand?"

"And if you get hurt?"

"I've survived this long, Peridot. Whatever happens, I'll be fine." Jasper grinned widely, her teeth flashing under the lights of the ship as she turned towards the planet. "Now let's go finish this mission."

*****

  
They land on the porous surface of the planet, a cloud of dust billowing upwards, obscuring their view before settling back down into the ground. They have a total of six warp pads to fix, all scattered throughout the planet. The first two warp pads are fixed without incident. They meet a few gems at the third pad, but one look at Jasper and they are left to their own devices. Peridot is beginning to relax when they finally make it to the fourth pad. Of course she should have known better. Jasper works with Peridot to operate the sealer. The oblong device is overly large and awkward for a gem Peridot's size. The force from the nozzle as the sealant shoots out doesn't help either, and Peridot has trouble keeping it steady. There has to be a better way to repair warp pads than this. She's certain there's better tools out there, but of course she'd get stuck with some reject prototype garbage. Peridot curses heavily under her breath and Jasper stands close to her, keeping an eye on the area.

Peridot is suddenly shoved by Jasper, the sealer knocked out of her arms as she's sent sprawling into the dirt. Before she has time to get up, a small group of dark green gems charge forward, weapons readied. Jasper's advice rings through Peridot's head and she scrambles up, begins to dash off, then hesitates and turns around. The first one, armed with a short sword, charges for Jasper, followed by a second with a mace and third with an axe. Jasper's helmet appears in a flash of light and she dashes forward, knocking two of them off their feet. A heavy stomp of her left foot and one of them pops, physical form collapsing under the weight of the blow. The other one quickly rolls to the side and rights herself while the other one, the one with the axe, makes a swing for Jasper.

Jasper grabs the axe in one hand and yanks forward, propelling the stumbling gem closer to her. Jasper grabs her and tears her body apart in one quick jerk, a puff of smoke and a dark green gem left behind. The third gem, the one with the mace, spots Peridot and tries to make a dash towards her. As Peridot tensed, ready to dash off again, Jasper grabs the third gem, whipping her around and smashing her helmet into the other gem's face. Another poof of smoke and the third gem's body is gone. Jasper picks up the inert gems of her fallen adversaries and chucks them into the distance. Peridot watches them sail through the air, becoming smaller and smaller until she can't see them anymore. Jasper turns back to glare daggers at Peridot.

"You should have run."

For once Peridot doesn't have a snippy comeback. Her body is tingling with fear, mixed with something else. This is the first time she's actually seen Jasper fight. It's nothing like their duels. Some part of her logically knew Jasper was holding back, but to see those gems reduced to their essential state in barely a minute... Peridot wonders what it must be like, to be able to smash anyone who would try to oppose her, to know that at any moment she could simply turn around crush anyone who tried to talk down to her, to hurt her. Jasper trudges away and Peridot quickly scurries after her.

There's only one warp pad left to fix now; a transport warp, designed to accommodate small-to-medium ships, large machinery and anything else too valuable to leave behind. The ship parked a short distance off, Jasper and Peridot both begin work repairing huge warp. After the incident at the fourth pad, they're both on edge, casting nervous glances around the grayish, dirt-tinged terrain. The planet is dull and lifeless, nothing more than an oversized ball of dirt ready to collapse into itself. Peridot can make out the outlines of an abandoned city in the distance, tall spires poking into the night sky.

The work is slow, made even slower by the constant need to reload the sealers. Peridot considers starting a conversation, but the warning look on Jasper's face makes her reconsider. They still don't know what's out there, or who's listening. After a while of constantly looking over her shoulder, Peridot allows herself relax and to get lost in her thoughts. Off in her own thoughts, Peridot barely notices that Jasper has turned off her sealer and is looking intently at something in the distance. She's finally jolted back to her body when Jasper lightly touches Peridot's shoulder and summons her helmet. Peridot follows Jasper's gaze, squints and then recoils at the sight. A monster of a gem, but a different type than the others, brown and green with four hulking arms swaying at her side.

There's a subtle shift in the atmosphere, a tinge of electricity dancing through the space around them. Peridot steals a glance up at Jasper. She's smiling. Large teeth bared and eyes wide under her visor, Jasper has become something Peridot doesn't recognize. Jasper's grip on Peridot's shoulder involuntarily tightens and Peridot slips out from under her grasp. Jasper either doesn't notice or doesn't care. Her focus is on the tank of a gem now trotting towards her.

Jasper shifts her stance and it seems to Peridot as if the planet shifted slightly too. Jasper springs forward, her body a round blur cleaving through the ground as she zooms towards her target. The big gem, what Peridot suspects is a Cassiterite or an Enstatite, braces herself for the impact. She's two heads taller than Jasper, and a few heads wider to boot. Peridot's eyes keep darting back to the extra set of arms. A fusion. She's never seen one in person. The air cracks as Jasper makes impact, forcing the brownish gem back a few feet. Jasper darts back as her opponent's gems glow, two hands reaching into their gems for a weapon. She gets a brief glance of a club and axe before they merge together, combining into a massive double-sided hammer. From Peridot's vantage point, she can see a brief glow coming from Jasper's face. Jasper has pulled something out too? The ground trembles as the larger gem smashes her hammer down where Jasper was standing. Peridot catches a yellow-orange blur darting forward. There's a flash of light, a crack of thunder, and the gem is gone. Peridot blinked. She didn't even see what Jasper did. Peridot trotted forward as Jasper walked up to meet her, the answer in her hand. A destabilizer.

In truth, it's a bit of a let-down. Part of Peridot wanted to see what Jasper could really do in battle. Jasper had seemed so eager to actually fight, and to cut it short by a destabilizer...it didn't make much sense to her.

Jasper raised an eyebrow.

"Disappointed?"

"No, it's just... I expected you were actually going to fight her. Like you did with the others."

Jasper scoffed.

"Don't kid yourself, Peridot. The point of a fight is to win. I didn't live this long by risking my life without a good reason."

As Jasper walked back towards the ship, Peridot realized she didn't really know Jasper at all. She'd participated in the civil war, was currently respected enough to be on speaking terms with Yellow Diamond and able to get assigned wherever she requested. What had she done in between the many thousand years between then and now? What had caused Jasper to come with her on this mission? Peridot no clue. They lead their ship into the transport warp, and stare ahead as the bridge is engulfed in a bright, blue light. The light clears and suddenly they are back in the loading dock on Homeworld. From the viewport Peridot spies a couple of Gems pointing and gesturing at her ship. She's made it. Her mission is complete, and she's okay.

It dawns on her that the mission is over. She'll go back to her old position and Jasper will go back to hers. Peridot suddenly wishes they hadn't taken the warp back. It seems too soon for all this to be over. She wishes she could have just a bit more time.

So it's finally over. Jasper stares at the back of Peridot's head as she looks out onto the gems slowly making their way towards the ship. Peridot's alive, for now. Jasper wonders if it will be enough, if she hasn't merely delayed the inevitable. She's a strange one, this Peridot. Jasper knows she's not likely to meet another gem quite like her again. Still, she has to give Peridot some credit. The little gem has enough fire in her for someone twice her size. Peridot turns to face her and Jasper considers saying something, offering some last piece of advice, but falls short. It doesn't seem appropriate now. Peridot appears to be thinking the same thing.

"Commander Jasper? I want to thank you." Peridot hesitates, looking off to the side for a second before turning back to Jasper. "I might have made a miscalculation when I first met you."

"Oh? The impeccable Peridot might have made an error?" Jasper asked, widening her eyes in mock surprise. Peridot groaned and rolled her eyes.

"Well, I'm not perfect, but you certainly aren't either!"

Jasper chuckles, her smile slowly fading. This is the last time they'll get to do this.

"Keep yourself out of trouble, Peridot."

Peridot nods.

"I will. Thank you again for your assistance. I...apologize for my earlier misjudgment of your character."

Peridot offers her hand to Jasper. She takes it, her own palm completely engulfing Peridot's fingers. Jasper is mildly surprised at how soft and fluid Peridot's fingers feel encased in her palm. She half expected them to be cold and unyielding. Jasper wonders to herself what would happen if she didn't let go. Could she keep Peridot contained in the palm of her hand, or would she slip through her grasp like water? Jasper lets her go, and Peridot slowly draws back her hand to rest at her side. Peridot opens her mouth once as if to say something more, but says nothing and only offers one last curt nod in goodbye. Jasper nods back, and Peridot turns around and walks away. Jasper imagines it's the last she'll see of this interesting little gem. She hopes it's been enough.


	2. Slow Burn

 

The transmission came to her some years later. Peridot appeared on the screen before her, looking badly shaken. A mission went wrong. Her small group was attacked during a recon outing. One Gem died, another five were badly damaged. Peridot was the only one to escape unscathed. Jasper's training saved her. She's in line for a promotion and a new job. Peridot ended her story with a request. She wanted to work with Jasper again.  

More calls made, another string pulled. Getting a technician authorized to work under her is easy. Jasper can't help but wonder if it was a bit too easy, if the Gems in charge of work distribution weren't a little too eager to have such a young, technologically-oriented Gem placed near Jasper's work. Then again, this was Peridot. It could also be that no one else was signing up to take her. In any case, the transfer protocol is completed within a short time, and it's not long before Jasper once again finds herself waiting for Peridot's arrival.

Jasper's occasionally wondered what Peridot had done with her life in the years since they parted. She had hoped Peridot was still alive somewhere. She was an interesting little Gem, no doubt about it. Her thoughts are interrupted by the sound of the door opening. There was Peridot, standing in the threshold.

The doors phase open and there's Jasper, waiting for her. Peridot exhales, and she feels as if she's been holding her breath for years. Perhaps she was. She tries to keep her pace slow, casual, walking slowly up to Jasper and taking her in all over again. She's done okay for herself since they parted. She's tried to keep Jasper's advice in mind, and while she's still not anyone's favorite, she's not in the same kind of danger she was when they met. She's tried to lie low for the most part. Working where she can be left alone, where her behavior won't be as much of a liability. Peridot had thought she would never see Jasper again, that the random circumstance allowing their paths to cross once was an anomaly incapable of being repeated. She didn't know what to expect when she had made her call out of the blue, but she knew what she wanted. A statistical impossibility.

"So you're alive." Jasper's first words to her after over a decade, and it's exactly what Peridot wanted. Short and unsentimental, but with just a hint of teasing. A slight alteration in her expression and tone that dared Peridot to fire back, meet her in the middle.

"Did you expect less?" Jasper smirks and Peridot knows she's hit her target. It already feels like before, feels the way it used to when Jasper challenged her, expected her to perform like they could be equals. Jasper's smile fades, her body straightening up, pulling on an air of authority like a well-worn cape. Jasper had to stop herself before she got too far. She can't let Peridot think this is way it will always be between them. The transfer is almost complete. There's just one order of business they need to get out of the way first.

"This isn't going to be like before, Peridot. This transfer means you'll be working under me. I'm going to expect you to do your job..." Peridot began to roll her eyes. "...and keep the sass to a minimum. I'll be your commander, and I won't have you disrespecting me. The special treatment stops here. I'll only ask once. Is that something you can really live with?"

Peridot paused as she considered her options. Jasper wouldn't go easy on her; she knew that. If she accepted this position, Jasper would expect her to perform to the best of her capabilities. Peridot also knew that if she looked around, it wouldn't be too hard to find a position like her old one where no one really cared too much about what she did. She could be left mostly to herself, wouldn't really be accountable for much of anything. She had to make a choice.

"I want to work with you," Peridot insisted. Jasper smiled, but seemed otherwise unsurprised.

*****

Jasper had warned her, and Peridot knew better than to be completely surprised, but working together on a full-time basis was far different than their single outing all those years ago. Jasper didn't have much time to spend on her; in the beginning their interactions are brief and to the point. There's no time to linger, no space to make little quips or actually talk to each other. The other big thing, of course, is that they're not by themselves anymore. Peridot didn't know why she was really surprised on that point. Perhaps it was because Jasper had always struck her as being able and desirous of working by herself. In any case, there was usually a small assortment of Gems that would occasionally work together with Jasper, and Peridot now found herself among them. They weren't a particularly terrible group, but Peridot didn't like them either. She made no effort to socialize or speak to them outside of the bare minimum required for her job.

Jasper knew better than to be surprised that Peridot could be a difficult Gem to work with. Working with Peridot for a little more than a month with nothing more pressing to do than spar once a day didn't reflect the realities of working with her on a day-to-day basis. Peridot could be stubborn, defiant, and a general pain the side of anyone who had to work with her. For the first couple of months Jasper was in a near-constant state of frustration as she tried to integrate Peridot into her new position. It was made all the worse knowing that in some way, Peridot was making an effort.

It didn't take her long to learn that when Peridot was left to her own devices, she was actually quite skilled and performed her duties well. For everyone's sake, Jasper tried to keep Peridot on her own or under her direct supervision most of the time. Still, it was inevitable that Peridot would have to interact with other Gems. Jasper had never seen Peridot work in crowds before. She didn't know whether Peridot's withering glares and sullen compliance were a step up from her behavior all those years ago or if she was mostly unchanged. In either case, she still had a long way to go.

Peridot's first lesson under Jasper's command came quickly. Jasper might have been willing to tolerate some of her back-talk when they were alone, but she wouldn't allow anything even resembling disrespect when someone else was around to watch. If another Gem was around, it was all professional. Peridot would eavesdrop sometimes as Jasper talked to her other subordinates. Every other phrase out of their mouths was 'yes, commander' or 'no, commander.' It made her sick. She wondered how Jasper could stand to be around Gems like that. Peridot wondered if it was always like that for Jasper, a never-ending stream of Gems who did nothing more than kissing up to her or blindly obeying her. Did she ever get sick of it? Did she ever actually get to talk to other Gems?

There was one thing to be said about any given conversation with Peridot. It was definitely a change of pace. Peridot always stopped short of outright defiance, but she was never hesitant to voice her opinion when she felt like it. She would ask questions without directly questioning orders and offer insight without plain opposition. She pushed boundaries, but she usually knew her limits. During the times she and Jasper could work by themselves, they fell into a rhythm. Without anyone else to watch, without any orders to give, their conversations became lighter, developed a rapport. Peridot speaks to Jasper like they're equals, and Jasper wonders at the fact that it doesn't bother her as long as no one's around. She had told herself not to encourage Peridot's teasing, but there was something to be said about the way she could fire back any barbs Jasper shot her way with equal measure, could make her feel at ease in a way she hadn't felt in a long time. Peridot wasn't her equal. She never would be, and Jasper knew this. Still, she'd never have become half the Gem she was now if she wasn't willing to go against the grain occasionally.

*****

Sometimes it doesn't seem like any time has passed at all. It certainly doesn't feel like it's been years since Peridot rejoined Jasper. Peridot can't really call herself happy, but for the most part she's satisfied in a way she wasn't before. Jasper's the only Gem who's ever bothered to take her seriously, who listens to what she says, makes an effort to find jobs where Peridot can do well. It's more than anyone else would have done for her.

It's just them today, but Jasper's off in another part of the building. She had some sort of meeting and Peridot was doing repairs. Having finished with her work, Peridot was wandering the building, taking in the sights before she met back up with Jasper. There wasn't much to see. This part of the building was closed down for repairs. As Peridot walked, a familiar panel in the wall caught her eye. A quick touch and the panel slid down, revealing a row of pristine destabilizers. It's been a long time. Peridot looked around once, confirmed the room remained empty, and pulled one out.

She twirls the destabilizer in her hand, an electric rush running through her as she recalls the days she was dashing and jumping off the walls, swinging and dodging as she fought with Jasper. That was a long time ago, though. Peridot sighed once and put the destablizer back where she found it. It was good while it lasted. She's halfway down the hall when she hears a short bark of laughter from behind her. Peridot whipped around and there was Jasper, standing at the instrument panel and holding a destabilizer.

"Just couldn't keep away, could you?" She asked.

"Maybe I just like to punish myself." Peridot replied. Jasper chuckled again, her short, heavy laugh echoing down the corridor.

"C'mon, we're sparring." Jasper said as she tossed the unactivated destabilizer over to Peridot. Snatching the forked device from midair, Peridot turned it over once in her hand before turning back to Jasper. She'd tried to keep up with her training in the years since their first mission, but there was only so much Peridot could do by herself when she had some free time to spare. She'd managed to survive her skirmish, but Peridot doubted she'd made any improvement significant enough to best Jasper. Still, she relished the opportunity to try again, just to see if she could do it.

"I thought you said the special treatment was going to stop." Peridot joked, twirling the destabilizer between her fingers. Jasper offered a wry grin in response.

"I did. I also said that your training would stop when I was satisfied with your results. Since you haven't managed to land a blow against me, I'm still not satisfied."

"You know, I'm a lot better than I was before. I might actually stand a chance against you."

"Fine." Jasper said with a casual shrug of her shoulders. "If you really want, we can make some changes. You keep the destabilizer inactivated, and I won't hit you."

"You never did actually hit me."

"And you never hit me either." Jasper retorted with a smirk. Peridot smiles back and leaves her destabilizer inactivated.

They face other, turn, and walk to opposite sides of the room. Peridot quickly eyed up the interior of room as she walked. The one benefit of their old junk ship was that in the cramped space, Peridot could use all four walls to her advantage, bounding from floor to wall to ceiling with ease while Jasper was stuck on the ground. Here, there's nothing but high ceilings and wide corridors. Peridot's grounded, and the one advantage she had is gone.

Jasper charges, jumping up and whirling towards her in a wild spin. Peridot dashes to meet her, calculating the milliseconds it will take until impact. Just before Jasper can reach her, Peridot twists to the side, swiping down as Jasper passes by, barely missing her. Jasper uncurled herself and lunged, making a swipe at Peridot. A miss. Another swipe and another miss. Peridot's gotten better since last time. Peridot takes advantage of Jasper's momentary lapse in concentration to jab at her hand, which Jasper retracts.

She's going to finish this now. Jasper dashes forward in a blur, clenching her fist in preparation for the final blow. There's a thump as Peridot jumps back, her back hitting the wall. She tenses, readies her stance, and thrusts forward. Peridot is against the wall, one hand firmly grasped on the destabilizer, the prongs resting on Jasper's chest. Her body is trembling slightly as she looks Jasper in the eyes. Jasper seems mildly shocked at this turn of events, her massive fist slowly uncurling and moving away from Peridot's body to rest limply at her side.

"You've won." Jasper states. Peridot shakes her head.

"No. If you were being really serious-"

"It doesn't matter." Jasper interrupts.

"Yes it does! I've always been clearly out-matched! You are far stronger than me and more skilled in combat. You-"

"Still doesn't matter." Jasper states yet again. She bends down, the prongs of the destabilizer riding up to rest neatly on her throat. "I could be the strongest Gem in this galaxy and it still wouldn't save me from a destablizer. All my years of training mean nothing against this." Jasper reaches up and rests her hand against Peridot's, still clutching the golden instrument.

"The world will change before you know it, Peridot, and there won't be damn thing you or I or anyone can do to stop it." Peridot stares at Jasper, her eyes going over every millimeter of Jasper's face as she speaks, absorbing the minute changes in her tone, her movement, the way her hand feels on hers. A thought comes to Peridot. It's one she's benignly entertained for some time since they reunited, but now something stronger has formed in its place; a desire to act.

"Take my advice, Peridot. Learn to adapt and don't do anything stupid."

"What..." Peridot's voice sounds foreign to her, as if someone else is speaking through her body. "What if I wanted to do something stupid, though?" Jasper's eyes narrow and she leans in closer, the prongs pushing deeper into her neck as her grasp on the destabilizer, on Peridot's hand, tightens slowly.

"Then you would get what you deserve." Jasper growls. Her words breath life, breath action into Peridot and before Jasper can react, before she can stop herself, Peridot leans up, standing on the tips of her feet, and kisses Jasper softly on the mouth. She comes back down to the ground, studying Jasper's reaction.

"Well then, what do I deserve?" Peridot asks. Jasper doesn't respond, doesn't move. Then without warning she jerks away from Peridot, walking quickly in the opposite direction. Peridot wasn't sure what to expect, but it wasn't that. For a moment she doesn't move, embarrassed with herself for being so forward with her commander, for being dumb enough to act on something she should have kept to herself. Before Jasper can walk too far, Peridot jolts into action, quickly trailing after her.

"Jasper, I...I'm sorry." Jasper says nothing and walks a bit faster.

"It won't happen again! It was an accident!" Still no response from Jasper.

"It was a mistake!" Jasper stops so suddenly that Peridot almost bumps into her. Jasper doesn't turn around. All Peridot can see is the way her fists clench.

"A mistake?" Jasper's voice is soft, tinged with something that sets Peridot on edge. Peridot fidgets for a moment, leans to the side slightly as if trying to get a better view, then thinks better of it and stays where she is, rubbing one arm and staring at Jasper's hair.

"What I meant was... I, I mean..." Peridot can feel herself getting more flustered and upset with each word that flutters out of her mouth. Stupid! She's so stupid, what was thinking? Did she really think a Gem like Jasper could ever feel the same way about a Gem like her? Fool.  

"Did you mean to do it or not?" Jasper asked, finally turning around to look at her. Gathering up the last of her resolve, Peridot managed to nod her head in affirmation a few times, her eyes cast downward. If there's any hope of salvaging this situation, it won't come through blatant lying. Jasper wouldn't believe it anyways.

"Have you ever done something like that before?" Peridot blushed deeply and shook her head from side to side, eyes still glued on the floor.

"Good." Jasper started. "Because neither have I."  

Peridot's eyes jolt back up to Jasper, who's leaning over her again. As soon as Peridot makes eye contact, Jasper slowly lowers her head until she's barely an inch away from Peridot, stops, then slowly brushes her lips against Peridot's slack mouth. Jasper's motions are hesitant, slow, her lips just barely making contact with Peridot, sending shivers down her body. She reaches down and places her hands on Peridot's shoulders, the sheer bulk of them practically capable of surrounding her small torso. Peridot reaches up, letting her fingers run across the surface of Jasper's face. Her body is hard and unyielding, except for her lips, softer than Peridot could have imagined. At Peridot's touch, Jasper retreats, removing her hands and drawing her head back slowly.

"How long have you wanted to that?" Jasper asked.

"A little while."

Peridot is staring at her expectantly, but Jasper can't think of anything else to say. For the first time in her life, she feels frozen. She knows nothing about this, how to react to Peridot, to herself. The whole situation is new to her, and it's not something that she can blindly charge through without worry for the consequences. For a moment she is frightened, and she doesn't know whether she is more afraid of doing Peridot harm or the knowledge that she's already losing her confidence over something like this. She doesn't know what to do, or what will happen to them now. Peridot is still looking at her, waiting for some kind of response, but for once Jasper doesn't have an answer for her.

"Did...you want to do that?" Peridot finally asks.

"Yes" Jasper says, and it's all she needs to say.

*****

Peridot wasn't sure if she had expected things to change, but she was thankful they had not. For the most part, their relationship remained the same. Small quips and sarcasm when they were relaxed, yelling and finger-pointing when they were not. They still had jobs to do. But when the jobs were over and they were left to their own devices, they could relax in each other's company, and for once Peridot felt comfortable being around another Gem.

They worked together as much as they could without attracting undue attention. Sometimes Jasper would be called out for other duties, and Peridot was left behind. There wasn't a choice. Peridot didn't mind so much when it meant she got to work alone. This was not one of those times. Peridot had been sent to do some maintenance on one of Jasper's ships, and a Gem named Larimar had come along. Larimar was a bleary-eyed and dull Gem who spoke in tones flat enough to make a two-dimensional object look weighted. Peridot had the misfortune of working with her before, and it was always torture. Peridot frequently complained about her to Jasper.

"Why do you even keep her around? A robot that nods its head and only says 'yes, commander' could do the same job."

"That's still a step up from what you do." Jasper sneered. Peridot rolled her eyes. "Besides, she's my personal attendant. She's seen the workings of that ship since I got it two hundred years ago."

"She's your WHAT?" Peridot squawked. Her shock wasn't unexpected. Gems didn't get assigned as attendants anymore, not when so much could be automated and AI systems weren't as unstable as they had been for millennia. The only ones left in such roles were hangovers from a time long past. Part symbolic, part practical, an attendant would only be assigned to Gems of prestige, ones who needed the extra help in managing all their affairs. A walking, living display of another Gem's importance. Peridot had always been aware that Jasper was important, but having a personal attendant was on an entirely different level. Then again, this was Larimar... As if reading her mind, or more likely her undisguised expression of loathing, Jasper interrupted Peridot's train of thought.

"She's assisted me for centuries, Peridot. She's a useful Gem."

"Please. Her mind's so porous I bet she's half pumice." Jasper snorted, then quickly made an effort to look serious.

"She was never meant to be smart; she was meant to be agreeable. Besides, she knows a lot about the ship. The sooner you fix it, the sooner you can come back."

So Peridot found herself traveling to the ship with Larimar, thinking to herself once again that an actual rock would make better company.

"So...You're Jasper's attendant?" Peridot asked when the silence became more unpleasant than Larimar's company.

"Yes." Peridot waited for Larimar to continue, but she didn't say anything else.

"For a personal attendant, I don't see you around very much." That got a response. Larimar glared at Peridot, her droopy, watery eyes shimmering with distaste.

"I mostly do commission work nowadays. I'm doing various things with the expansion committee for newly discovered solar systems."

"Ah." They lapsed back into silence. The ship in question had been well cared for, hull bright and shiny under the illumination of the docking station. Deep inside lay the source of the problem, a disturbance of the crystal heart powering the ship and functioning as the mainframe. Once inside, Peridot set to work. Her first order of business was to plunge herself into the ship's computer to see if there was anything obvious. She immersed her hands and the streams of data flooded her mind, her body only a vaguely-recalled imprint as her consciousness zipped in and out of the length of the ship. She can feel that something is amiss, a spinning, dizzying sensation, but she can't tell exactly what's wrong. There's a sudden, spiraling lurch as she rushes through one of the lower quadrants, closer to the starboard side. There. Whatever's happening is there. Peridot pulled out and Larimar trotted along after her.

Once Peridot settled in the right area she removed a panel from the side of the ship and exposed a clear vein of the heart. She could see the pulses of energy firing through the vein, coursing throughout the ship. Everything looked normal from the outside. There's a tiny maintenance port leading into the vein. Peridot inserted one finger into the port, bringing up a flowing stream of data on the holopad in her other hand.

"So what's the problem?" Peridot suppressed a groan as Larimar leaned over her.

"I'm working on it." Peridot growled. Why did she have to get stuck with this bozo? Honestly, it was no wonder Jasper never kept her around much. Peridot did her best to keep her remarks to herself and turned back to her panel. She dug deeper into the wall of the ship, inspecting the glassy veins of the crystal heart as they shimmered and pulsed with life. She could feel Larimar standing behind her, gawking dumbly. Didn't she have something better to do? Peridot tried to refocus on her work, one finger resting in a vein, her holopad deployed in her other hand as she ran a vital check on the sensitive structure. Larimar was still behind her, shifting from side to side, trying to get a better view of Peridot's screen.

"Perhaps you should run a diagnostic on the local relays?" Larimar offered.

"I'm well aware of how this ship works, thanks."

"Could have fooled me." Larimar muttered quietly.

"Anyone could fool you." Peridot snapped, quickly turning back to her work. She can hear the sounds of Larimar's feet stamping away from her. Finally. Maybe now she can get some peace and Larimar will stop being such a pain.

*****

"You're reprimanding me?" Peridot shrieked. Jasper grumbled under her breath and rubbed the bridge of her gem. How many times did they need to go over this? Was Peridot still this reckless or did she think Jasper was going to start giving her a free pass for her behavior?

"I've warned you before about watching your mouth, Peridot." Peridot groaned and rolled her eyes. Not this again. How many times did Jasper need to keep saying this. She'd heard it the first time. She did watch her mouth, most of the time. Really, all things considered she ought to get some praise for not going off on Larimar sooner. Jasper scowled.

"You need to care more about what your superiors think." Peridot didn't answer for a bit, just her crossed arms and made a sour expression. Finally, shooting a quick glance up at Jasper, she replied,

"...I do care what you think." Jasper's face softened.

"I meant Gems other than myself."

Peridot soured again.

"I don't see what the problem is. You know what I can do. I work well for you, and that's all that should matter."

"It's not that simple. If you anger the wrong Gem again-"

"You can just put in a good word for me!" Peridot interrupted.

"No, I can't!" Jasper snapped. "You need to learn to control your mouth!"

"But why?" Peridot shot back.

"Because I might not always be able to bail you out of trouble!" Jasper yelled. Peridot jerked back, snapping her head up to look at Jasper. Jasper quietly cursed herself. She shouldn't have said that. That wasn't something Peridot needed to hear.

The truth was that there were fewer and fewer strings Jasper could pull. Each one once tugged dissolved under her touch, leaving her with nothing more than a few insubstantial grains of dust. The connections she's forged, the power she'd gained, the respect she'd earned, she still had it firmly in her grasp. But part of her knew that if she loosened her grip for even a moment, it might start slipping away. She had to hold tighter and tighter, work longer and harder to do maintain what used to be freely given. She was a Jasper. She was a fighter. She'd spent over six thousand years clawing out a place for herself near the top and Jasper would be damned before she'd let any of it slip away from her. She couldn't afford to keep wasting her clout on Peridot's stubborn refusal to keep her sass in check.

"I'm sorry." Peridot muttered quickly. Jasper sighed and ran a hand through her hair.

"Just promise me you'll make an effort from now on." Peridot nodded and Jasper gave her a quick pat on the head before leaving the room.

*****

Sometimes Jasper didn't understand Peridot. She was a Gem built for this new world. By all means, she ought to have fit into society perfectly. But she didn't, of course. There was something just slightly off about her, like a piece out of shape in such a subtle way that one couldn't help but keep trying to force it into the correct place and being constantly frustrated when the piece refused to fit. She always seemed bitter about her work, but never asked for different tasks or made the effort to rise above her middling rank.

Jasper had asked her about it one day, after Peridot had come back from an assignment in a large metropolis on Homeworld. Peridot hadn't given an answer, just shrugged and mumbled some vague excuse. She'd trailed Jasper for a while, always close but always just out of reach. She didn't say anything, just watched as Jasper went about her work. Jasper knew the routine. Normally Jasper would let her be, and after a while Peridot would say something and they would fall back to normal. This day, Jasper decided to confront her about it.

"Do you like your work here, Peridot?"

"It's work, Jasper. What do you expect me to say? How much I love serving the almighty Gem empire? That I really enjoy constantly fixing broken trash? That staring into space for hours when I pilot a ship is just what I've always wanted to do?"

"Well, what do you want?" Jasper snapped in frustration.

"I don't know. Not this."

"Do you want a transfer?" Jasper asked quietly.

"No!" Peridot quickly hissed, a quick flash of fear reflected in her visor. "I didn't mean it like that. I just..." She sighed and looked up at Jasper appraisingly. "How did you do it?" she asked.

"Do what?" Jasper asked gruffly.

"All of it! You're a Jasper, you're supposed to..."Peridot stopped herself, aware that she was on the verge of saying something she could never take back. She saw the way Jasper had already tensed herself in preparation for the blow. Peridot retreats, sinks back into herself. "I hate this. I hate _being_ like this. Why do I always get stuck having someone tell me what to do? Why can't I be the one ordering someone else around?"

"If you don't want to be treated like you're fresh out of kindergarten, then you need to act like it. If you really wanted to be respected, then you need to earn it!" Jasper growled at her, still reeling from the shot Peridot had nearly fired at her.

"That's a load and you know it!" Peridot shot back. "Technicians always get treated like dirt! We don't get to command ships, the best we do is pilot or build them, and even that's not much! Why should I bother making an effort when nothing's going to change? I'm always going to be stuck at the bottom!"

"That's because other Gems never cared enough to do more with their lives. If you want something badly enough, you take it! You work towards your goal and don't let anyone get in your way. The only reason you haven't made more of yourself is because you never bother to make an effort!"

"We can't all be paragons of Gemkind like you, Jasper! Don't act like I can do what you did when you always had the deck stacked in your favor."

"You know _nothing_ about me." Jasper hissed. "You don't have the slightest clue what I had to do to get where I am now. Don't you _ever_ think I had anything handed to me."

She's right. Peridot knows it, but it still hurts, still feels like she's the one who's been wronged. Jasper's right. She knows nothing at all about her, but still, they're not the same. Whatever Jasper's done has been the exception, not the rule. Asking her to compete isn't fair. Peridot's already done so much, pushed herself so far outside of her normal bounds, but it never seems like enough for Jasper.

"Don't think I wouldn't be more like you if I could." Peridot murmured as she stomped out of the room, leaving Jasper to herself.

*****

They were waiting for her a few months later. She had strolled into the control room and there they sat in front of her. The small, light blue orbs lay in a neat pile before Peridot, perched atop a small docking station next to a control panel. Peridot walked up and saw herself reflected in their iridescent hulls, a couple dozen copies of her own quizzical face looking back at her. A quick plunge of her hands into the control panel reveals the nature of the spheres. Remotely operated robots of a basic crystalline AI nature. Their programming is something Peridot has never seen before.

"They're called robonoids." Jasper explained as she entered the room. "After all the recent skirmishes, it seemed like a good idea to start removing Gems from basic recon and repair work."

Peridot jerked her hand out of the panel and turned around to look at Jasper.

"They're still in prototype stage, so we need volunteers to test them and report on their performance. If you accept, you'll be in charge of their maintenance and programming, and sending them off on recon work. Interested?"

Peridot feels dizzy. She turned back to look at the inert machines, turning things over in her mind. Semi-autonomous robots she could control, use and command as she saw fit, run interplanetary missions in her stead. All hers. Her body feels insubstantial and weak, as if she could simply shimmer and fade away, leaving just her gem behind. For a moment she can't speak, can't articulate what she's feeling. How can she explain this? What this means to her, how she knows what Jasper's done? Everything that flits through her mind feels inadequate and cheap. She can only really think of one thing to say.

"Thank you," Peridot breathed quietly. Jasper nodded, doing her best to mask a smile.

"I expect a full report on their functionality as you use them throughout your coming assignments." Peridot nodded and turned back to her new acquisitions. Jasper left Peridot to tinker with her them and to conceal the grin that refused to keep hidden.

*****

It couldn't always be that way. Their lives were chaotic, and Jasper's missions frequently put them in danger. When Peridot started accompanying her, she quickly learned that Jasper became a different Gem under stress. The leniency and jokes disappeared in a flash, leaving behind a Gem that could be terrifying to behold. Jasper was the Commander, Peridot was the Subordinate. Jasper ordered, and Peridot followed orders. She did not want to think about what might happen if she decided to get snarky at the wrong time.

They'd been skirting around an area on the border of Gem territory. Only one planet and two moons were in use, all of them sparsely habited and under less than stellar control. Jasper had gotten reports that a couple of Gems had seized a government ship and were running amok in the area with it. So here they had come, tracking down the rogue Gems. Their ship was tiny and nimble, outfitted with a standard set of weapons and shielding system. They've been searching for weeks with no success.

Peridot was at the controls while Jasper stood behind her, examining a map of all the docking stations on the nearest moon. The ship is jolted suddenly, a resounding crack slicing through the air as they are fired upon. Jasper skids but keeps her feet while Peridot is sent sprawling. She jumped back up to her feet as Jasper rushed over to the control panel with her. Images from outside are pulled up on screen. The stolen ship appears before them, its laser charging for another blow. Peridot plunges her hands back into the controls and pulls the ship upwards, just in time to avoid another strike.

"Charge at them!" Jasper snarled as she dug a massive hand into Peridot's shoulder. "Full speed!"

"But Jasper-"

"JUST DO AS I SAY!" Jasper roared. Peridot flinched and glared at Jasper, but turned back to the control panel and complied. The ship shot forward, hurtling closer and closer towards their opponents.

"SHIELDS! NOW!" Jasper roared. Their ship hummed briefly as the shield activated. Peridot braced herself and Jasper dug her fingers deeper into Peridot. The other ship tried to turn and flee, but was clipped on the side. There's a resounding screech and rumble as the two ships make impact. The shield absorbed the brunt of the damage, unlike the dented remains of the abducted ship. It doesn't take them long to board the ship, capture the thieves, and return home. There's some superficial damage to the hull, but nothing too serious. Peridot told herself that she was used to the turmoil that always came with such missions, but after all is said and done she still finds herself shaking a bit as she recalls what happened on the bridge.

Jasper offers no apology for her actions, and Peridot neither asks for it nor expects it. They know each other well enough by now to understand that who they need to be during their work is separate from who they are together. Their work personas are etched into their existence, but it's not their entirety. Scratching beneath the surface reveals someone else. Peridot sometimes wonders if this side of Jasper is something meant and created entirely for herself. Peridot knows that Jasper has the ability to turn her into someone she normally is not, an unseen facet only revealed under Jasper's close examination. The softer side of Jasper, is it something only Peridot has seen? Was Jasper ever like this with another Gem? Or is there another side of Jasper that someone else has known that she never will? Peridot wonders, but she never asks.

The dust had settled, but Jasper was still tense. She has no regrets about her behavior towards Peridot. For all her whining, Peridot isn't a pushover. She worked well under pressure, far better than most of her archetype could ever do. Besides, Peridot knows what to expect working with her. They've done this for years. Jasper tells this to herself, but it does nothing to settle the knotted pit in her body. She tracked down Peridot as she was roaming the halls. Jasper wasted no time getting to her point.

"Upset?"

Peridot let out a light huff.

"I was more concerned about the damage to the other ship. Wasn't the point of our mission to retrieve it?"

"That's exactly what we did. If they have any complaints about the damage, they can take it up with me."

"Whatever you say, Yellow Diamond."

Jasper's eyes flash with a hint of something Peridot isn't completely sure is amusement. She hunches down over Peridot, her shadow falling heavily across Peridot and hisses softly,

"Talk like that might be taken as insubordination, you know."

"...and?"

"If someone else heard you talking like that, they might find grounds to punish you."

"Is that so? Well, what are you going to do about it?"

Jasper takes Peridot's head in one of her large hands and tilts Peridot's head upwards. Still holding her, Jasper leans down closer and kisses her. Jasper's touch is firm, controlled, but not rough. Never rough. The moment passes quickly, and Jasper pulls away from Peridot, releasing her hold. Such moments are fleeting and far between. Intimacy doesn't come naturally to them. Even the small gestures push them both outside their comfort zones.

Allowing anyone to find out about their relationship would be a risk for both of them. For Peridot, it would be definitive that she didn't know her place, that she was only trying to get a quick promotion and an easy life. For Jasper, it would be proof that she'd finally gone soft. That she'd allowed herself to be taken up into something that was a distraction at best and a fatal character flaw at worst. That she'd fallen for the wiles of a Gem who everyone would say was a social climber, looking to claw her way up by standing on any Gem stupid enough to bend over for her.

If they were discovered, the best case scenario would be separation and demotions. Jasper didn't want to think too long about what the worst case scenario would be. They had to be careful. If worse came to worse, Jasper's rank might be able to buy herself some relief, but for Peridot... if their relationship became known as more than casual, Jasper wasn't sure if anything she did would be able to help Peridot anymore.

It didn't matter. They were always careful, and besides, Jasper knew where she stood in society. She was important. No one was going to get the best of her. There was nothing to worry about.

*****

"You're doing _what_?" Jasper roared.

"This is a good opportunity, commander." Larimar said flatly. "You know I've always been loyal to you. But I've been stuck in this job over three hundred years. Zoicite asked me personally to work under her. This transfer is a good thing." Larimar watched blankly as Jasper paced, then turned to her, narrowing her eyes.

"Listen. If you stick with me..."

"I have stuck with you. But a chance to work with Zoicite in the Expansion Committee isn't something I can pass up. She's going places."

"And what do you think I've been doing? Standing still?" Jasper roared. Larimar looked down and away, a futile attempt to avoid saying what they both knew she was thinking. Jasper watched Larimar writhing under her gaze and for a moment she wanted nothing more than to deck her, to show her that she wouldn't tolerate that kind of insolence. But she knows it would be worthless, mere proof that her fists carried more weight than her reputation.

"...May I be dismissed, Commander Jasper?" Larimar asked meekly.

"Just get out of my sight." Jasper hissed. Larimar obliged, scurrying off before Jasper could change her mind. Jasper shot one last withering glare in Larimar's direction, thought idly about what she'd really like to do, about what a thankless deadbeat like Larimar really deserved, before storming off, her heavy footsteps ratting the walls as she stomped away. Peridot's reaction to Larimar's news was less dramatic.

"Well, good riddance," she told Jasper. "You don't need a dusty mud-licker like her."

"Go ahead, say what you really think." The statement was intended as sarcasm, but Peridot either didn't catch it or willfully ignored it.

"Well, for starters I think if Larimar got any duller she wouldn't be able to cut through air." Jasper kept her scowl, still looking a thousand miles away. Peridot continued.

"We won't have to listen to that weird way she squeaked when she asked questions."

"...I hated the way she did that." Jasper conceded. Peridot smiled and continued, going into minute detail about the flaws of her ex-coworker until Jasper had to allow a small grin. Feeling victorious, Peridot sat next to her and said,

"We'll be fine, Jasper."

Jasper's small smile faded as quickly as it came. She said nothing stared out into space again. Really, what was there to say? That part of her wasn't surprised, that Larimar had been getting itchy for years and finally jumped ship. That a job under her is no longer the height of prestige it used to be, that her name doesn't carry the same weight as it did hundreds of years ago. That part of her knows that she's not just fighting for society, she's fighting against it, trying to swim up current against the inevitable stream of change and she's not sure how much longer she can keep doing this. If she's working this hard to maintain her status now, what will she have to do in another thousand years? She feels a light pressure on her arm and looks down. It's Peridot, her hand on Jasper's arm, gently shaking her back into reality.

"Back in your body?" Peridot tries to make it sound like she's still joking, but Jasper can tell she's worried.

"Yeah." Jasper gives one of her toothy grins to Peridot. "Don't think I'm going anywhere."

*****

She's heard rumors about it for years, but Jasper had it on good authority that the plans in motion are genuine. Homeworld wants to check back on Earth. Of course, the warp pad's been down since the war ended, and no one knows for sure what happened since the Second Strike. Someone has to go investigate first. Someone like Peridot. She could do it. Jasper is certain of it. Jasper is also certain that if she really pushes the right Gems, she can get Peridot the job. But should she?

The truth is that Jasper isn't sure how many more strings she has left. She should save her favors for when she needs them, not to keep making Peridot's life easier. Still, it's the opportunity of a lifetime. If Peridot can pull this mission off, it could be just the boost her career needs. It's something Peridot can build on, use as a starting point to propel herself upwards. Peridot wouldn't be stuck with Jasper constantly having to look out for her. Maybe this is what Peridot needs to finally start looking after herself.

One last favor. The pulling of a final string. Jasper approaches her one day with the news.

"I found a new assignment for you, Peridot. You're going to check up on Earth."

 


	3. Collapse

 

Jasper ground her teeth expectantly. It had finally happened. Peridot was being sent to Earth. They'd parted ways a few weeks ago. Peridot had to undergo initiation for her mission and was under the guidance of a small crew of Gems who would prep her for the tasks and challenges ahead of her. Jasper was not among them. At the very least, they'd allowed her to bring the robonoids along with her. While Peridot was being trained, they were modifying a new flask-type Robonoid capable of autonomously finding and fixing warp pads. It wasn't much, but it was one less thing for Peridot to worry about. Jasper paced and thought back to the day leading up to their departure.

*****

They'd spent most of the day acting normal, as if the upcoming mission was as routine as anything they'd encountered before. As if nothing would change, no matter what the outcome would be. It was only when most of the day had slipped away that the illusion faded and the full reality of the situation gripped them.

"Be careful." Jasper had reminded her, letting her massive palms rest on Peridot's shoulders.

"I will." Peridot told her, a confident smile beaming from her face. She's not afraid. Jasper trained her well. Peridot knows how to defend herself, when to run and when to fight, how to spot danger before it spots her. Peridot's far more suited to the dangers posed by this mission than any Gem of her archetype.

It might not be enough. It might mean nothing.

Every scan they've made since the Second Strike came back negative for signs of Gem inhabitance. There's no reason to believe Peridot will face any threat greater than a hairless biped wielding a pointed stick. There's no proof any Gems survived, certainly not one as powerful as their ex-leader herself. Jasper isn't convinced. If anyone could stay hidden for thousands of years, it would be her. They have no way of knowing for certain.

Maybe Peridot will be fine. Maybe she'll fix the Galaxy Warp, activate the Kindergarten, and triumphantly lead Homeworld Gems back to the planet they lost. Maybe Peridot will get the respect she so desperately craves, and Jasper can work with her to get the planet habitable again. Maybe it will work out fine.

Or maybe she'll die.

Visions of the war flit through Jasper's mind, the crash of swords meeting in battle, the acrid, smoky smell of a Gem loosing their physical form for good, the flash and boom and rush of burning air as an explosive detonates nearby, the lurch in her gut as she realizes she's lead her squadron into a trap, that her recklessness is going to lead someone under her command to their death.

If any of these survivors are left, Peridot will die.

Jasper's hands slide down from Peridot's shoulders onto her back, one hand resting on top of the other as Jasper pulled Peridot closer, pushing them together. Peridot stiffened under the embrace. Her face was pressed into Jasper's midsection as Jasper leaned down to rest her forehead on top of Peridot, her long hair trailing around them. They had never done this before. Peridot didn't know what to think, what this meant. She remained tense, expectant, as Jasper quietly whispered down to her.

"That wretched planet swallowed up almost as many Gems as it spit out. Don't you dare let it take you too."

"I won't." Peridot whispered back.

She cannot hold on forever.

Jasper slowly released her hold, rising upwards. Peridot remained pressed against Jasper for a few moments longer before she too pulled away.

"I'll come back."

Jasper nodded.

*****

The next few weeks passed together in a blur as Peridot was prepped for her mission. She had only been vaguely aware of the planet Earth. All she knew about it was that it had been a former colony, but was abandoned millennia ago after a war. Now she's been given a crash course on the planet, data on the native dominant life forms, geological structure, average temperature, gravity and so forth. Other Gems explain her mission, show her the basic structure of the Kindergarten, how to operate the machines, and where to find the precious cargo hidden within the control room. Along with her robonoids, Peridot was given a few upgrades of her own. Some like the tractor beam are more practical, others like the laser cannon seem excessive for what should be a simple task.

"Don't worry, this will be an easy mission."

Peridot side-eyed the Gem speaking to her as she examined the cannon formation of her hand.

"No Gem could survive what we threw at them. Honestly, I wouldn't be shocked if the native species went to dust too."

The Second Strike. Peridot knew even less about that than she did about Earth. A few years ago, Homeworld detonated some kind of weapon which was supposedly powerful enough to kill every remaining Gem on the planet. According to everyone Peridot's met, Earth should be free for the taking. With all the mounting evidence they present, it's hard not to believe them. Still, Peridot thought of Jasper and their last conversation. She wondered what Jasper was doing right now.

*****

She had simply appeared out of the blue, lost and floundering among the stars. The whole affair had been kept secret, but that did nothing to prevent the shockwaves at her arrival. A lone Gem returning from planet Earth. It was her existence that finally triggered this mission, convinced the right Gems that now was the best time to return to the planet they'd lost so long ago. Jasper had heard about this strange Gem, but today she was finally going to meet her. Jasper trudged down the hallway of the holding facility, doing her best to keep her last meeting with Peridot out of her mind. This would be more than enough of a distraction. The door dissolved under Jasper's presence and the Gem from Earth was in front of her. Her eyes were the first things Jasper noticed. Wild, panicked, the eyes of a trapped beast doing its best to convince its attackers that it wasn't terrified but failing miserably.

Six thousand years away. To be gone for that long and come back to this, it's incomprehensible. There's nothing left for her here. Jasper's lived through every year since the war, has seen her society change in ways she could never imagine. Even now there are some times when she feels like gasping, like screaming as loud as she can at this unfamiliar world, demanding the rightful return of the home she knew. But she knows as well as anyone that that world's gone for good. Whether she likes it or not, this lost Gem will have to accept it too.

"Lapis Lazuli."

"...Jasper."

They recognize each other, the way all Gems do. It's something hard-wired into their being. Even without the instinct, Jasper would be hard pressed to forget a Lapis Lazuli. There had never been many of them, but the kind of damage they wreaked on Earth was unparalleled. They weren't so fortunate elsewhere. Few planets had any sizable bodies of water, and of the hundreds of thousands of planets Homeworld had found and colonized over the millennia, perhaps only a few dozen had water like Earth. It was one of the reasons they didn't grow her type anymore.

"It's been a couple hundred years since I've seen one of your kind." Jasper offered.

"Try six thousand." Lapis shot back. There's no humor in her statement, only a cold bitterness. Jasper bit back a retort and tried again from a different angle.

"So you were part of the 17th Sea Division?" Lapis held her arms to her sides and looked downward. It took her a while to respond.

"Yes."

"Is there anyone you wanted us to track down?" Jasper asked quietly. Lapis blinked and looked up, her chest rising and holding, her breath caught in place. The moment passed and Lapis held herself even tighter, gaze returning to the floor.

"...No..." She whispered. "There's no one."

Jasper said nothing and waited until Lapis' curiosity got the better of her. It seemed like ages when Lapis removed herself from her reverie and focused on Jasper.

"Why are you here?" Lapis asked.

"Tell me how you got here."

"I've already explained what happened dozens of times now." Lapis snapped. "How many more times do you people need to hear it?"

Jasper narrowed her eyes. She should have known. She never liked the elementals. They were always too temperamental for their own good, always thought a shower of sparks here or a bit of fire there meant they could stomp and scream and get whatever they wanted. This Lapis was no different. Even after six thousand years away from her own people, she's snapping and sulking the moment things aren't going her way. Little brat.

"This isn't about _our people_. I want to hear this for myself."

Her story seemed straightforward enough. She was trapped by the rebels during the war and used as a tool for a few years before she was tossed into the sea. She was encased in her prison for thousands of years. When she finally washed up on shore, a human freed her gem on accident, allowing her to escape. That by itself would have been extraordinary enough, but she also claimed that she was attacked by rebel survivors while fleeing.

Crystal Gems. Jasper hadn't heard that phrase in thousands of years. The name the rebels gave themselves, the ones who chose the grimy trash-heap called Earth over their own people. Jasper bit back her disgust and refocused on everything Lapis had told her. The story made perfect sense. There was no reason to doubt her.

Jasper didn't trust it. There was something just a bit off about the whole thing. Being trapped for a few centuries, or maybe a single millennia, might have made sense. But to not wash to shore in all that time? For a healthy, undamaged Gem to be incapable of escape for over six thousand years? For her to conveniently meet and escape from Rebel Gems just as she freed herself? No, it didn't add up. Not to mention that even from under the ocean, she still should have been affected by the Second Strike. At least some of story is a sham. Jasper isn't sure how much is true and how much is made up, but if there really are Crystal Gems still on Earth....

Jasper tried to push those thoughts out of her mind. Peridot knew how to keep herself safe, and she had her robonoids to explore the planet in her stead. Peridot wouldn't put herself in danger. She'll be fine. There's nothing Jasper can do for her right now. Instead, Jasper refocused on Lapis and began to ask more questions about what these surviving Gems were like.

*****

Peridot returned. After three months of training and not even a single day on the surface, Peridot had returned. The mission had started smoothly enough. As part of her training, Peridot had been informed that at the very edge of the solar system in which the Earth resided, there was a portal warp hidden on a moon of a distant planet. It had been ignored due to the fact that not only was it too tiny to send even the smallest of personal crafts through, but it was also so degraded that it was in danger of collapse if it was ever used. In short, far too dangerous for a Gem, but for something like a Robonoid, it would serve just fine.

The three months of training had been horrid. In some ways Jasper had spoiled her. She'd almost forgotten what it was like to spend her days surrounded by others of her archetype. She hated it. Peridot had always held a particular loathing for other technicians. They were a bunch of spineless, group-thinking clods. Or at least that's how it used to be. Peridot didn't see herself in these Gems anymore. They joked about being tough, but Peridot knew she could best every one of them in combat if she was given the chance. She bet that if any them were placed in real danger all they could do would be to cower and beg.

The three months was a barrage of monotony that couldn't end soon enough. When the time came for her to finally send her robonoids to the planet's surface, she was more irritated and bored than she'd been in a long time. Working from her own remote station, Peridot observed closely as the warp transported all 79 flask robonoids and, as Peridot was to learn later, one lost, floundering Gem who was extremely fortunate not to have been torn apart in a collapse during her journey through it a few months prior. She couldn't wait for this wretched mission to be over and done with. It had taken all the Robonoids about three days to assemble to the Galaxy Warp and repair it.

She was successfully transported down to the surface on the newly fixed Galaxy Warp. Only one robonoid had been damaged during its time on the surface. She put her foot on top of it, thinking of all the Gems she had to work with, thinking about how they'd probably just squirm and flounder helplessly too if they were injured. She stepped down hard, but the resulting squish wasn't as satisfying as she'd hoped it would be. She took a step off the Galaxy Warp, ready to find the warp leading to the Kindergarten when something caught her eye.

*****

"I found something."

Peridot held up an unknown icon on a flat sheet. She had returned safely to her station, and after another warp to the control center, Peridot could think of only one Gem to contact about what she found. Jasper had come to her almost instantly.

"I found it stuck to the Galaxy Warp."

Peridot handed the bizarre icon over to Jasper. It depicted a round being in great distress, arms held up in surrender. Jasper held it up closer, mulling over the meaning of the image. Some depiction of a Gem reduced to its essential state, most likely, with the weeping expression and upturned arms making it apparent that the Gem has been defeated. The design of the Gem creature is strange though. The way the lines run through it, it almost looks like...yes, yes she's certain of it.

"We need to tell Yellow Diamond about this." Jasper growled.

"WHAT?" Peridot exploded. "WHY? It's just a weird picture! We can't just-"

"Look at again, Peridot!" Jasper snarled, shoving the icon at Peridot's face. "It's a picture mocking her! That's the shape of her distress flare! That's a defeated Gem! You found this _thing_ on the Galaxy warp! Someone put this...disgusting mockery up to claim their victory."

Peridot looked at the icon again, a cold ripple of fear running up and down her body. Now that Jasper said it, it does look like a Gem. But still, to contact one of their leaders over...this? A tiny picture?

"Jasper, we don't know how long this thing was there!" Peridot countered. "Maybe they put it up before the strike. It doesn't prove anything!"

"If it doesn't prove anything, then why did you return?" Jasper shot back. "Why did you insist on showing it to me?"

"Because..." Peridot paused as she put together the events in her mind. She didn't have any proof the icon meant anything, and despite her insistence, Jasper didn't have any proof to back up her claims either. They didn't know when it was placed there and who did so. There was nothing to prove the icon meant something dangerous was lurking around the corner.

But if there was one thing Peridot had learned from all her years of dangerous missions with Jasper, it was that something _was_ always waiting for her, even if she didn't see it. She was not like Jasper. If she was attacked, Peridot's choice was always to flee. The best option of all was not to be attacked in the first place. Everything about this icon screamed danger to her. The fact that it was on a place so isolated, that only the Galaxy Warp had been tagged while the others remained blank, the picture itself of the sad being, all of it made her uneasy.

"Because I know it means something. I just don't know what. And for that matter, neither do you. We can't prove anything about this. We shouldn't take drastic measures before we have evidence to back it up."

Jasper made a clicking sound with her teeth and studied the icon again. Peridot was right. She knew what it looked like, what every fiber of her being told her it was, but she couldn't know for certain. If this icon was something else and she came crying to Yellow Diamond over something that was irrelevant...Jasper had to weigh the options. Was it better to put Peridot at risk, or herself? Who was really in danger? Jasper's hold on the icon tightened, causing it to crease.

"Alright. But if you find even the slightest proof that this could be a threat, we're contacting Yellow Diamond directly."

Peridot nodded once.

"That's perfectly reasonable."

"So that means you won't do it?" Jasper asked her.

Peridot gave Jasper a small shove.

*****

The ocean Gem was right. She was right too. Jasper had acted against her better judgment by letting the icon incident go unreported. Jasper cursed herself for letting it slide. Really, she should have known something was amiss when Peridot told her that the Galaxy Warp was inactive again. That was one thing she had to be thankful for about the whole fiasco. Peridot didn't go back to the surface. She'd been remotely attempting to activate the Cluster when they showed themselves. Crystal Gems.

The Gems Peridot described matched Lapis' descriptions. A small Amethyst, a Pearl with a spear, and a larger Gem Peridot couldn't identify who wore a visor and used gauntlets. Some of Rose's army had survived, which meant that Rose Quartz had survived too. There was no avoiding it. Yellow Diamond had to be informed about this.

After the Crystal Gems had smashed the control hub in the Kindergarten, Peridot had fled back to Jasper, reporting everything she had learned. They were the reason the Galaxy Warp was down again and why so few of her robonoids survived their trip to Earth. They had somehow managed to find a way to destroy all the ones that made it to the surface, despite the fact that their landing sites were scattered across the globe.

It amazed Jasper just how often and just how closely Peridot seemed to avoid deathly encounters. No matter where Jasper led her, danger was always just a few steps behind Peridot, never quite able to catch up to her. She hadn't lost her form even once. With her dumb luck combined with years of training, Jasper wondered what would happen if Peridot was left to do the mission herself. Would her luck hold out? Would she survive?

Part of Jasper wanted think that she could not, that without her guidance Peridot would be the same lost, clueless Gem she was when they first met.

The smarter half of Jasper knew better.

Peridot stood anxiously in front of the closed door. She could hear murmurings from the other side, one voice familiar, one unknown. Jasper was in the process of speaking to Yellow Diamond about all that Peridot had seen. She'd gone to make the transmission over an hour ago, and each minute that passed seemed to take longer and longer. Peridot was desperate to overhear what they had to say, but she wasn't foolish enough to try getting any closer to the door or eavesdrop by other means.

Ultimately, it was up to Yellow Diamond to decide what would happen to the mission from this point. All Peridot could do was wait until Jasper was finished. Peridot stepped away from the doors once she heard the conversation stop. Jasper emerged a few seconds later, looking shaken.

"She wants to speak to you alone."

Peridot gaped, looked to Jasper, then looked back towards the room Jasper had just left. Jasper shook her head.

"In person."

Peridot inhaled sharply. She was supposed to speak to Yellow Diamond? One of their leaders? But what was she even supposed to say? Hadn't Jasper told her everything? As if reading her mind, Jasper shook her head again.

"I don't know why. That's just what she said."

Peridot gulped and tried to steel herself.

"What's she like?"

"She's going to test you. I can't tell you exactly how, but she's going to get into your head. Make you squirm. She's going to see what you're made of and you may not like what she finds."

Peridot hadn't even met her and she already felt sick.

*****

"So, you're Peridot?"

The room they are in is small and dark, the dimness making it seem even more cramped. The only light comes from a few monitors on the wall, illuminating Yellow Diamond as she stood with her back to Peridot, a small tablet cupped in her hand. Peridot began to nod, but quickly realizing the foolishness of nodding to someone who wasn't looking, instead offered a quiet

"Yes, Ma'am."

"You came quite highly recommended by your superior." Peridot opened her mouth and tried to choke out a 'thank you' but a glance backward from Yellow Diamond stopped her, the words dissolving on her tongue. Her leader's eyes are a piercing gold, brighter than the room. They scared her. Yellow Diamond continued, turning casually towards Peridot as if she hadn't even noticed.

"Which is quite interesting, considering what your previous superiors had to say. Do you want to hear how they described you?" Her eyes flitted back down to the small screen in her fingers. "Defiant, Arrogant, prone to Back-Talk, does Not know her Place."

Peridot's words of gratitude died in her throat, rotting in her mouth and sending a shudder through her. Yellow Diamond looked back up to her again, her brilliantly bright gaze burning into Peridot. Peridot did her best not to squirm but her leader's eyes are a pale fire, scorching through Peridot's body.

"Now why would all that suddenly change once you started working for Jasper?" Yellow Diamond's voice is pristine and crisp, her tone perfectly level. She does not sound contemptuous. She not sound gleeful. She speaks with a lapidary's precision, her words perfectly designed to cut through a Gem in just the manner she saw fit. All Peridot can do is try and stop herself from writhing as Yellow Diamond smiles thinly and watches her failing attempts at keeping calm. What's unnerving is that Peridot can't tell what she wants, what Yellow Diamond is thinking. There's something dangerous in the way Yellow Diamond looks at her, something that tells Peridot she needs to choose her words carefully.

"Jasper is...a good commander."

"I think there's more to it than that. Do you know what I think, Peridot?"

She knows.

"I think you're ambitious."She knows about her and Jasper. Yellow Diamond began to walk towards her and Peridot can feel herself trembling. She tried to think of something, anything to throw off her suspicion but her mind is a whirl. She's floundering, grasping, reaching wildly for every thin thread of credibility she can muster but everything that flits through her mind is an incoherent mess.

" _Do_ you want more, Peridot? Do you want better than to be under Jasper's command?"

So this is the test. If she says no, it's clear proof she and Jasper are together. She'll get Jasper in trouble, she'll get herself in even deeper trouble for being involved with someone so above her station. But if she says yes it's still proof that she's merely aiming to get the highest ranking she can. She'd be throwing Jasper away, betraying her commander's trust and respect. She can't say No. She can't say Yes. Peridot struggled, grasping wildly in her mind for a good response. Something to pacify Yellow Diamond without casting her lot one way or another.

"I...I don't know what more a Gem like me could even have."

Yellow Diamond smiled widely and Peridot knew she made the wrong choice. Yellow Diamond was barely a foot away, coldly radiant.

"You could have so much more than this, Peridot." She placed a hand on Peridot's arm. "With a little effort, you could go right to the top."

Peridot jerked backward, stumbling over her own feet in the process. Yellow Diamond's smile vanished and for a split second Peridot saw the look of confusion on her face. Yellow Diamond regained her composure and Peridot did her best to regain hers as well.

"Fine," Yellow Diamond told her. "It's your choice. But remember what we've discussed. Take some time to think about what you really want."

She whipped around and walked off.

"You're dismissed."

Peridot stood in place, still trembling.

*****

"You look like a wreck."

Jasper waited for a snappy retort, but none came. It wasn't much of an exaggeration. Peridot had returned looking anxious and unseated, avoiding Jasper's gaze. Jasper hadn't met anyone whose first encounter with their leader went any better. She was an intimidating Gem, even by Jasper's standards. Jasper still didn't know why Yellow Diamond had insisted on speaking with Peridot. Everything was a mystery with her. Even after six thousand years Jasper could never predict what she would say or do.

"That bad, huh?"

Peridot shot a wary glance up to Jasper.

"What...did Yellow Diamond do, when you met her for the first time?" Peridot asked.

Jasper was quiet for a while.

"She said I wasn't as stupid as I Iooked, and I thanked her for the compliment."

They don't talk about this. In all the years they've been together, Peridot has made a point never to mention what most Jaspers are like. She knows it bothers Jasper sometimes, hanging like a weight on her shoulders. It's a legacy Jasper has never quite escaped, no matter her rank or accomplishments or centuries on centuries of contributions to the empire. At the end of every day, she is and always will be a Jasper. Peridot knows that she shouldn't pry any farther. Jasper's already revealed more about herself than she's comfortable sharing. She really shouldn't...

Peridot squeezed her arm.

"Was there...did she do anything else?"

"Just more of the same. Told me how impressive it was that a brute like me could have achieved my station, that she never would have expected one of my kind to make it so far. Why, what she tell you?"

"She..." Peridot hesitated, releasing her grasp on her arm. "She mentioned what my old superiors said about me." Peridot bit her lip. "I don't think I made a good impression."

Jasper scoffed.

"You're still in one piece and you're posed to lead a mission to Earth. If you ask me, you must have at least made a decent impression."

Peridot said nothing.

*****

The Hand of Justice loomed over them, the loosely curled fingers casting thick, barred shadows on the docking station floor. Peridot stood to the side, taking it all in while Jasper walked underneath, inspecting the ship more closely. Yellow Diamond had decided. Peridot was to pilot the Hand of Justice to Earth, use it subdue whatever remained of the opposition, and finish her mission with the Cluster and the Kindergarten. Peridot looked over and saw Jasper heading back towards her, shaking her head.

"What do you think of it?" Peridot asked her. Jasper shook her head again.

"A Hand of Fury would've been better."

Peridot craned her head upwards to look at the ship again. The Hand of Justice was an average-sized ship. Severed from the rest of its station, it didn't look particularly impressive by itself. Peridot had only seen a Colossus once, and the fleeting glance of it floating past was enough to make her almost consider feeling a bit sorry for whatever imminently doomed species it was heading towards. In most respects the two ships were an identical pair, but where a Hand of Justice was more for defense and capture, the Hand of Fury was solely meant to destroy.

The Hand of Justice took prisoners. The Hand of Fury did not.

There was still some work to be done before Peridot was ready to leave. Jasper watched over her as Peridot calibrated herself to the ship's AI. It would take time for Peridot to gain the precision a ship like this needed to operate at its peak. Jasper could only stare at Peridot's code-clouded face for so long.

"I'm going to make some calls," Jasper said as she left the bridge. Peridot nodded, but kept her hands firmly embedded in console. The one good thing about embedding herself in a ship was that Peridot lost all sense of time. She could keep herself suspended in this half-conscious state indefinitely, 'waking' to find that anywhere from several hours to entire weeks had passed in her absence. When Peridot finished her calibration, it was no surprise that she'd been out for a few hours.

She called out for Jasper, but heard nothing except the quiet hum of the ship. Digging her hands into the control panel again, Peridot pulled up a map showing one room of the ship currently in use. Of course Jasper was still making calls. Peridot had never known another Gem who balanced so many things at once. Peridot made it down to the room Jasper was using when the door burst open. Jasper stormed out without offering so much as a backwards glance at Peridot.

Peridot poked her head into the room. In her hurry to leave, Jasper had left the console on. Peridot quickly looked back in the direction Jasper had gone, but she was nowhere to be seen. Well, there was no sense in leaving it on. Besides, it was better to leave Jasper alone when she got like this. The console was still up, displaying a long list of Jasper's calls. Peridot quickly glanced at it as she made a move to turn it off. Her finger hovered over the control panel as the last name on the list caught her eye.

Heliodor.

Peridot could count on her fingers the number of Gems Jasper had to answer to. Why had Jasper called one of them? What had made her so upset? Peridot turned the monitor off and left the room as quickly as she could, but the feeling of dread still followed her. Jasper had cooled down somewhat by the time Peridot found her, but it was clear that Jasper was still simmering over whatever her last conversation had entailed. This was not the mood Peridot wanted Jasper to be in for the moment. Jasper gave a quick nod to Peridot and began to walk off.

"Good luck on your mission," Jasper offered as she made her way towards the exit.

"Jasper, wait." Peridot called after her. "I want you to come with me."

Peridot had hoped Jasper would have been in a better mood when she asked, but Peridot didn't know if she would get another chance. The ship was fully stocked and would soon be ready to leave. She didn't want to do this on her own. Even with the new ship and the promises that her mission should be an easy one, it scares Peridot. She knows there's something she's not being told. There's more to this planet, to the vague stories about a war and rebels and the Second Strike than she knows. But Jasper knows. Whatever's out there, Jasper could protect her from it. That is, if she wanted. Jasper scoffed at Peridot's request and kept walking.

"You need to do this on your own, Peridot."

"Jasper, that's crazy!" Peridot called as she hurried after her. "These Gems are dangerous! I need you for back up."

"You can't always rely on me for help, Peridot!" Jasper snapped, whirling around on her. "You need to start learning how to protect yourself!"

Careful, Jasper, careful. She always has to remind herself when she gets like this. Jasper took a deep breath and tried to focus on the sensation of air filling her body. A trick she'd learned on Earth, something to help her calm down when all she wanted to do was give in to her destructive urges. Her body still feels electric from the anger and she wished she had an outlet. She wished could just scream and smash and run until her body was ready to give out. She hasn't been able to do that in a long time, though. More importantly, this isn't the time or the place. She needs to find a good way to end this conversation.

"Besides, this is supposed to be your mission. You need to get the credit for this. If I oversee you, it will just look my victory, not yours."

The excuse is a fat load of slag and they both know it. Peridot knows something's amiss. She didn't mention what she had seen on the ship. Peridot knew there were a lot of things Jasper didn't divulge about herself. She's known that even after all their years together, there's still so much Jasper won't talk about. Peridot accepted that a long time ago. If Jasper ever wants to speak about Heliodor's call, she'll bring it up. In the mean time, Peridot made the effort of acting as if she didn't know.

"What if you didn't come as my commander? What if you were just my escort again?"

Jasper shook her head.

"I can't afford to be away right now. You'll be fine."

"That's not what you thought last time!" Peridot yelled. Jasper tensed as she thought back to Peridot's departure. She thought back to Peridot, wrapped in her arms, ready to leave for the great unknown. She thought of the way Peridot had leaned into her, her tiny body pressed against her own, before she pulled away and left. Jasper clenched her fists. She thought of Heliodor. Peridot looked up at her, wide-eyed and frightened.

"Jasper, don't make me do this by myself," she whispered.

"Peridot, I can't!"

"Jasper, please."

Heliodor's words rang through Jasper's head again. She doesn't have anymore leeway. She had to make a choice. Jasper prided herself on many things, and her ability to make tough decisions was one of them. When Yellow Diamond or another Gem wanted someone to dirty their hands, Jasper was always willing to raise hers. She did what she had to do. She always did what she knew was right, even if others hated her for it.

Even if others suffered for it.

Jasper looked at her hands again.

If she didn't look after Peridot, who would?

Peridot was her own Gem. Jasper wasn't her keeper. No one had ever looked after her, and she'd done just fine. No one _would_ look after her, either. If Jasper didn't take care of herself, no one would. That's the way it was for everyone. Why should Peridot expect different? Why should she save Peridot? Who was going to save her?

Jasper dug her fingers into her palms, holding tighter and tighter, until she slowly let go.

Heliodor was right.

"I'll need to make some more calls," she mumbled, then silently walked away, a slowly rolling storm. Peridot wondered if she'd made the right decision.

She didn't see Jasper for a few days afterwards. The preparations for the ship had been completed, and Peridot was ready to leave. Jasper had simply walked onto the bridge where Peridot was working without so much as a call beforehand.

"Thanks for coming." Peridot muttered.

Jasper didn't say anything.

"So it's just the two of us again?" Peridot asked. Jasper shook her head.

"Not quite."

*****

Peridot didn't trust this Gem. She didn't like the look in her eyes, the way something dark and hidden glinted under the surface. She's cooperative. She's told them the location of the renegade Gems' base and what they can and cannot do in battle, but there's something she's hiding. Peridot and Jasper both know it.

Things had settled down between them since their departure. They'd had plenty of fights in the past, but they had always blown over quickly. This was different. Something lingered in the air between them, refusing to leave. Peridot didn't pry. She'd said enough on the matter already. It was easier to pretend like everything was normal in the hopes that soon enough it would be.

"Do you really trust her?" Peridot asked Jasper one day, when they were out of Lapis' earshot. Jasper made a clicking noise with her tongue.

"Lapis is nothing we can't handle."

"That's not what I asked."

"She doesn't have a choice. If she wants to find a place in society again, she has to cooperate."

"Don't be cagey, Jasper. You're terrible at it." Peridot knew it was a risk to say. There was a chance Jasper wouldn't find it funny, that it would hit too close to whatever had been gnawing away at her. Instead, Jasper sneered down at her.

"This, coming from someone who doesn't have a speck of subtlety in her entire body?"

Peridot slowly rolled her eyes in mock offense.

"Let me put it this way," Jasper continued. "I think that most of what she's willing to tell us is true. As long as her agenda doesn't interfere with ours, I don't care what she's keeping to herself."

The closest warp to Earth still entailed a long journey. Peridot did her best to keep herself busy, but there wasn't much to do. She really wished Lapis hadn't come along with them. She had free reign of the ship, but most of the time she kept to herself. If that was all, she would have been tolerable, but Lapis would occasionally wander up and down the halls, completely silent. It was impossible to tell when she was coming or if she was already in a room. Sometimes Peridot would be working on the bridge, turn around to leave, and find Lapis standing near the door, watching her. When she did talk, she was always curt and snippy. Peridot was more willing to avoid interacting with her.

At the very least, the trip gave Peridot more time with Jasper. Peridot always liked when they could be together on a ship. A few weeks into their journey and it already felt like things were back to normal. Peridot had gone to track Jasper down, since she hadn't seen her a few days. When she found her, Jasper was sitting in front of a control panel with a number of screens pulled up. From what Peridot could see, there were some various graphs, pictures of a few planets, and in the middle of it all a large screen filled with a wall of text, various lines highlighted or circled, linking to smaller annotations. Peridot approached slowly as Jasper picked through some data, the lines on one graph rising and falling with the alterations.

"Jasper?" Peridot called out softly. Jasper whirled around, all the panels disappearing back into the control panel. "What was all that?"

Upon seeing that it was Peridot rather than Lapis, Jasper relaxed and turned back to her screen as Peridot walked up behind her.

"I was working on my proposal for the Symposium," Jasper said as she pulled up a graph from the control panel. "It's coming soon."

"You've mentioned that before. What is it?" Peridot asked. Jasper turned back to Peridot, making little effort to contain her pride.

"The Symposium a panel of high-ranking Gems who meet once every hundred years to discuss current events, recent changes in politics and technology, and think of ways to advance our society over the coming years. To even attend is a great honor, and to be chosen to sit on the panel is the mark of a great leader." Jasper grinned widely, waiting for Peridot to glare at her in envy. Peridot looked at her flatly and said,

"So it's basically just a big gem-polishing circle."

"Don't be vulgar!" Jasper snapped, a faint hint of a blush dusting her face.

"Well, I'm sorry, but a bunch of ancient Gems sitting in a room telling each other how smart and powerful they are sounds like the exact definition of a polishing circle if I ever heard one."

"I'll have you know we do important things at the Symposium!" Jasper snarled, her face still tinted slightly more red than normal. "Aside from the Diamonds, I'm one of only two Gems who've held a seat since the start.   And we-" Jasper stopped as Peridot began to silently make a circular rubbing motion with one hand.

"YOU STOP THAT RIGHT NOW!" Jasper roared, her face more red than orange. Peridot quickly drew her hand back to her side, but there was still a mischievous glint in her eyes, the corner of her mouth turned up just a little too much in an effort to hide a grin. Jasper was still burning with embarrassment and indignation. She got up and stormed out of the room, ignoring Peridot's half-hearted requests for her to stay. Peridot muttered something and Jasper quickly stuck her head back around the corner. "And if I catch you making those obscene hand gestures again, it's an official reprimand!"

*****

Lapis still kept to herself, and Jasper was glad for it. She had enough concerns without adding Lapis to the mix. It had been nearly impossible tracking down anyone who might have worked with her, and the few Gems they did find couldn't recall her. As far as the authorities were concerned, it was like she had never existed at all. That had been part of the impetus to bring her along. If she was willing to prove herself on this mission, it would go a long way in getting her a good placement.

As long as she cooperated. Even though she was obliging so far, she always dragged her feet in the process. She was huffy when questioned and would avoid looking at them. If Jasper or Peridot happened to pass her, she would cast sullen glares at them while keeping her head down.

Jasper knew something had to be on Lapis' mind. She'd been following Jasper around for a few hours without approaching her, as if Jasper didn't know Lapis was watching her from behind some corridor. By the time Lapis had finally approached her, Jasper's patience had already worn thin.

"Can I ask you something?"

Jasper narrowed her eyes, but allowed Lapis to continue.

"Peridot. Is she...what exactly is she?"

Of course. _That_ kind of question.

"She's a Gem, you twit."

Jasper had hoped Lapis would get angry enough to storm away without asking any more questions. She's definitely upset, that's for sure. But instead of walking off Lapis stood her ground.

"I know what Gems are and she is not a Gem! She's something else! Is she a robot?"

Of course Lapis wouldn't know about the advancements in Gem production since she'd been trapped. Peridot's existence wouldn't make sense to her. Jasper tried to control her feeling of indignation but it was hard, it was hard not to feel a rush of anger at Peridot being called a robot. She quelled it the best she could and explained.

"Peridot's gem was grown from a Crystal Heart. The technology in her body is part of her."

"But that's...how can she even be a Gem? That would still make her a robot, wouldn't it?"

"Peridot. Is. A Gem." Jasper repeated slowly through gritted teeth. "She's a manufactured type, just like they used to make Pearls."

Lapis gave a derogatory snort and crossed her arms.

"She's not like a Pearl at all."

"You're right. Pearls were neurotic and outdated. It's why they stopped making them a long time ago. Just the same as your type."

She's hit her mark. The force of Jasper's blow sent Lapis reeling, stumbling backwards in shock. Jasper was glad for it. She'd had enough of this petulant brat with a chip on her shoulder and a holier-than-thou attitude. Someone needed to put her in her place.

"You think the universe owes you a favor, Lapis?" Jasper sneered. "Well guess what? Nobody owes you slag. Same as the rest of us."

She marched off and left Lapis to wallow in her pool of self-pity.

*****

Peridot really didn't understand why Jasper wasn't more concerned about this mission. Or rather, she didn't understand why Jasper seemed more concerned about her silly speech than the possibility of taking down seasoned war veterans on a desolate, post-kindergarten wasteland. Jasper kept shutting herself up to work on her project, and it wouldn't be long before they made contact with Earth. Intending to break Jasper of her reverie, Peridot had brought two destabilizers in a holster in hopes that she could convince Jasper to spar with her.

"If you're going to mock me again, then just leave. "Jasper snapped without turning around.

"Jasper, I was joking about that." Jasper scoffed and kept her back turned, fiddling with a graph.

"Why are you so upset anyway? You go to stuffy meetings like that all the time."

"Leave." Jasper barked. "Now."

"Jasper, it's just some stupid-"

"This is important to me! " Jasper roared as she smashed a fist down on the console. "If the Symposium isn't impressed, then I don't know what's going to happen to me. Do you understand that?"

She can't stop herself.

"I blew off Heliodor to help you! She's pissed, Peridot. She's pissed and she's going to use this against me. I needed her support and instead I'm here looking after you! So if I can't make up for it with this proposal, then I'm in trouble. I need to prove I still matter!"

It's finally out. The truth about her, the mission, everything. The ship is so quiet it almost seems like they can hear the sound of the stars passing them by.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Peridot whispered.

"Because it wouldn't make a difference."

"But-"

"No. Don't you dare say you wouldn't have asked if you knew. Because either you really did need me here or you lied and I gave up an opportunity I needed for nothing. So tell me, Peridot, which was it?"

Peridot stared at her.

"I need you here."

"Then it doesn't matter," Jasper murmured. She studied Peridot's expression and let out a huff. "Don't look at me like that. I'll be back on top in no time. I'm spent my whole life fighting for power. This is no different."

"Do you do anything without a fight?" Peridot asked as she cast a wary glance up to Jasper.

She's exhausted, suddenly. She's drained down to her core and all Jasper wants to do right now is forget for a little while.

"Do you want to find out?" she whispered, leaning down over Peridot. Peridot took her arms and raised herself on her toes, leaning closer.

"Excuse me..."

They snapped their heads towards Lapis, standing in the doorway.

"There's...something wrong with the view port on the lower deck."

They pushed away from each other as if propelled by a magnetic force, Jasper quickly turning back to her screen and Peridot hurrying off to the lower deck, refusing meet Lapis' suspicious glances. Everything depends on this mission. Jasper stabbed the holoscreen with a trembling finger. They need to subdue the opposition, restart the kindergarten, finish the Cluster project and get back in time for the Symposium. She can't afford to fail.

*****

Their mission may have been compromised. They were in their last leg of the journey to Earth when they caught Lapis alone in a control room. Jasper's eyes darted from Lapis' poorly contained look of guilt and terror and the console to her back. Jasper lunged forward and Lapis ducked, ran past her and tried to shove past Peridot. Peridot grabbed her arm and jerked her backwards into Jasper's grasp.

"Let go of me! Let go!" Lapis snapped and she squirmed and pulled at Jasper's closed fist. Jasper looked towards Peridot and tilted her head towards the console. Peridot hurried past them both and brought up the most recent data.

"She made a transmission." Peridot started. She pushed her fingers deeper in the console. "What even is this frequency? It's archaic!"

"WHO DID SHE CALL?" Jasper boomed.

"I...I don't know. There's no reception data. I can't even tell if anyone received it." Peridot pulled her hands out as Jasper yanked Lapis up off her feet to dangle at eye level with her.

'WHO DID YOU CALL?"

"No one." Lapis hissed, clawing futilely at Jasper's hand.

As Lapis dangled in Jasper's grasp, her tiny body swaying as she was suspended in the air, Peridot was absolutely certain that Jasper was going to kill her. Peridot had seen Jasper in battle. She had seen Jasper when she was angry. She had never seen her like this. Peridot remained frozen as she watched. Jasper's grip tightened and Lapis locked eyes with Jasper, hate burning down to her core.

"If this mission has even the most minor setback, I will personally see you tried and executed for treason." Jasper growled, a low, rolling thunder that tinged the atmosphere of the ship with an electric current of dread. Hand still encased around Lapis' tiny wrist, Jasper dropped her to the ground again and jerked her forward as she walked, causing Lapis to stumble. Peridot trailed after them as Jasper half-lead, half-dragged a terrified Lapis to one of the many holding cells in the ship. It was a cell by itself, at the end of a long hallway. Far away at the other end, a tiny window looked out into the emptiness of space. Jasper picked up Lapis by her wrist again and tossed her inside. Lapis crumpled into a heap, making no move to rise from her spot on the floor.

"Hope it was worth it," Jasper spat as she marched away. Peridot gave one last glance to Lapis before following after Jasper. Whatever element of surprise they had might be gone. If Rose and her army were still around, they'd have time to prepare a resistance. The worst part of was they had no way of knowing what to expect. Peridot had been given evaluations of all the weapons and technology available, and everything she had indicated it would be no match for the Hand of Justice. They might as well throw rocks and sticks like humans for all the good it would do. But then again, nothing should have been able to survive the Second Strike either. For all they know, these Gems have been developing their own weapons and tech for six thousand years. The mission hadn't even started and Peridot already felt like they were stumbling. She wished she knew what was going to happen to them.

The call came the next day.

Peridot had been walking down the halls, engrossed in some inconsequential data on her holopad. Suddenly, Jasper's bellowing roar echoed down the corridors, bouncing off the walls and filling the ship.

"NO! You can't do this!"

Peridot jolted and stared off towards the area Jasper's voice had come from. Snapping her fingers back to her side, she dashed through the ship until she head another Gem's voice close by.

"I'm very sorry, but it's already been done."

Peridot stood in the end of a corridor leading into a hall where Jasper was speaking to someone. Peridot gave a quick peer around the corner. The hall lead to a dead end, with an unknown Gem staring down at Jasper from the floor-to-ceiling screen. Peridot quickly ducked her head back and pressed her body against the wall.

"But I've always attended the Symposiums!" Jasper shouted.

"Yes, well, we felt that a...ah...change was in order. New challenges require a fresh perspective, you understand?"

"When Yellow Diamond hears about this..."

"She's already been informed of your absence."

Peridot feels sick. This is wrong. She shouldn't be listening to this, she shouldn't have to hear the silence so heavy it feels like tangible presence, crushing her and Jasper into something unrecognizable. She should go, but her feet won't move. She stays stuck in place, forced to listen as Jasper's final verdict is passed.

"Commander Jasper, your opinion has always been highly valued. It's simply that we need Gems who are more...attuned to the issues of society at the present. It's nothing personal. You do understand, don't you?"

"I understand perfectly." Jasper's voice cuts through the ship, rough and painful, her jagged words sawing through Peridot.

"Wonderful. Best of luck on your...ah...escort mission then."

The transmission ends, and Jasper smashes her fist through the wall, sending a rumble through the ship. Peridot jolts, her head spinning. Sick. She feels sick. How can they do that to her? A Gem like Jasper just being tossed aside like she was rubble, an unliving stone, it's unthinkable. If Jasper can be treated that way, what hope is there for someone like her? What will happen to her in a hundred years? A thousand? Will she even be alive in six thousand years? Will Jasper?

Jasper crashes down the hall and before Peridot can even think to dash off, to pretend like she never heard any of it, Jasper is suddenly looming over her. She knows. For one fleeting moment, Peridot is terrified.

The room has gone cold. It suddenly strikes Jasper as ridiculous to think that something as insubstantial as their ship was ever supposed to keep the incomprehensible iciness of the void at bay. Fool. She's a fool. She's always been a big, lumbering, stupid fool blindly charging ahead. She is a Jasper. She is disposable. It's just taken longer for her to be thrown away.

"Jasper..." Peridot reached out a hand to touch her and Jasper jerked away, snapping backwards out of Peridot's grasp.

"Don't." Jasper rasped. "Just don't."

*****

She's losing her. The closer they get to Earth, the more Jasper slips away from her. Bit by bit, little pieces of her fall away. The jokes. The banter. The calm, self-assured way Jasper normally carried herself. It's all crumbled away, leaving behind something else. Something jagged, cold, and unrecognizable. Part of Peridot wants to say it out loud, that Jasper isn't this gem, this isn't her, but another, deeper part of her is afraid. Afraid that maybe this _is_ her and that the years Peridot's known her is nothing in comparison to the millennia Jasper's been alive. Peridot is afraid that maybe she never actually knew Jasper at all. She has to say something. She has to stop this before it's too late, before Jasper disappears entirely.

It's not hard to track Jasper down. She's been spending most of her time staring out the windows facing towards their destination. Jasper was standing alone, her back to the doorway. Peridot gathered up her courage and walked forward. She has to do this. After everything Jasper has done for her, she has to at least try to save her commander from herself.

"What do you want, Peridot?" Jasper asked, turning around to face her. Peridot steeled herself. Courage.

"Jasper, about the call..."

"I don't want to hear it," Jasper snapped.

"I'm sorry." Peridot continued. "About everything. You didn't deserve it, you were-"

"Don't you dare try to give me your pity! Do you remember who I am?"

"Jasper, I just-"

"I AM YOUR COMMANDER AND YOU WILL RESPECT ME!" Jasper roared.

She went too far this time. Watching Peridot stumble backward, the fear and betrayal in her eyes, Jasper knew she'd pushed Peridot too far. She shouldn't have said that. As Jasper began to word an apology, something else invaded her mind.

Helidor was right.

Jasper closed her eyes and remembered Heliodor's words.

_"You've gone soft, Jasper."_

She swallowed her apology back down, letting the heavy weight rest uncomfortably inside her.

"Just...go back to the bridge, Peridot."

Peridot retreated slowly, keeping her eyes on Jasper as she left. Jasper didn't stop her. She waited until she was sure Peridot was gone before turning back to look out into the empty void of space. She's on the verge of losing everything she's worked millennia to gain. Her progress is slipping through her fingers like dust. She's fumbling to keep it contained but more and more keeps slipping away from her and Jasper knows it's only a matter of time before she's left with nothing, becomes nothing.

No. She'll never let that happen. She clawed her way to the top once, and she can do it again. This new mission to Earth, back where she started, it's another chance for her to regain all her lost glory. She can almost hear the rumble of cannon fire in the distance, the familiar sound of her gem humming in anticipation of an imminent battle. Rose Quartz is there. She knows it. There's no chance she didn't survive the last war; she's hiding on Earth somewhere, and Jasper will find her. She'll capture Rose Quartz herself, do what not even the rest of the Diamonds could do. She'll gain all her power back and more, holding a spot on the top for millennias to come. She can feel it.

All she has to do is take it.

No more distractions. No more weakness. No more sacrifice.

They'll arrive at Earth in a couple of hours. Jasper stood in front of a window, staring into the distance and waiting for the first sign of the ball of dirt and betrayal and destruction that made her. She ran her fingers across her cape, the thick, heavy material draping on her shoulders with a familiar weight. As she's staring out into the void, Peridot's reflection appears on the glass. Jasper doesn't acknowledge her.

"Jasper..."

"What?" She snaps, turning to Peridot. Peridot hesitates before answering.

"I know things...are changing. But please, don't do anything stupid."  

Jasper turned back to the void.

"Don't _ever_ say that to me again."

"Yes, commander," Peridot whispers.

Jasper is lost to her.

The ship hurtles forward, leaving only darkness behind.

 


End file.
